Eric Holder Forces Dinesh D'Souza To Plead Guilty To Crime Of Loving Free Speech Too Much
Remember back in January how unstoppable tyrant Barack Obama and his evil minion Eric Holder threw filmmaker and pretend smart person Dinesh D’Souza in a gulag for the terrible crime of not loving Obama and for believing in free speech and being an all-around hero? And Dinesh was all like "trumped up charges blah blah blah did I mention I made a film I will fight this to the death"? Looks like some of Obama's goons got to noble Dinesh, because today he pleaded guilty to one of the charges -- a criminal count of making illegal contributions in the names of others. It looks like the plea allows him to skate on the other charge of making false statements.
Let's wander down memory lane and remember what the hell he was charged with, shall we?
Mr. D’Souza, it seems, was so very enthusiastic about a New York candidate for U.S. Senate that, frustrated that federal law only allowed him to give $5000 to senatorial candidate Wendy Long, he went out and got other people to donate to her too, and then he reimbursed them for the donations, to the tune of $20,000.
Oh, right! That was the best! It was a super clear violation of the law, but then we had to listen to one million conservative Dinesh defenders explain that it shouldn't be a violation because they really wish the law did not exist. People, we really wish that we could run down pedestrians when they cross against the light, but we don't believe if we do undertake such an endeavor that it would be an effective defense to simply say we wish that no prohibition on our pedestrian-hitting existed.
Do you think Dinesh gets a going-away party before he is locked away in Guantanamo Bay forever for the crime of loving free speech and Wendy Long too much? Will Rush Limbaugh pick up the tab for the strippers and beer or just bring Oxy for everyone? Who will bring a gross of handkerchiefs for Glenn Beck's glycerin tears as he bids Dinesh adieu? Who will be the chairperson of the FREE DINESH movement? Tucker Carlson maybe?
Man, these guys are all gonna be SO MAD their friend was forced under Eric Holder's boot heel. We're going to be able to write about this FOREVER.