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Everyone Is Playing With Etch A Sketches, Because of Politics!

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Romney guy Eric Fehrnstrom sure made a funny when he went on television today and said of the general election, "It’s almost like an Etch A Sketch. You can kind of shake it up and restart all of over again." What an IDIOT. Now everyone is making mean jokes about the Etch A Sketch children's toy, on Twitter and TwitPixxx. Look at Rick Santorum in the car there, playing with his Mitt Romney gaffe toy, and not enjoying it at all. Ol' Newt is playing with the drawing machine too! Oh, these wiseacres.


Check out Fathead here, who brings his sticker-clad Etch A Sketch on all campaign trips. How else is one supposed to kill time on the bus after exhausting the entire Internet's worth of pornography?

This election is now Newt Gingrich's to lose, again.

[Images via Matt Beynon and Ginger Gibson]

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Donald Trump held another great big slob picnic in Orlando, Florida, last night, where he "announced" the "start" of his 2020 campaign, which will be exactly like his 2016 campaign except for the minor detail that he's actually been in the White House since 2017, which is really a bummer, man. Still, it's no reason he can't run as an outsider who vows to protect everyday Americans who believe he's just like them. The rally was a mishmash of the same damn shit he's said a million times before, and the rubes loved almost every minute of it except for the boring parts when he talked about stuff he's supposedly achieved in office, because not even his supporters care about trade policy or tariffs. They want an enemy, and they want to be told they and Trump will destroy that enemy together because they are the real Americans. So that's what Trump gave them, again and again, a feast of fear and resentment designed to get them to the polls. It was enough in 2016, and Trump thinks it'll do the job in 2020.

If there was anything new in the speech -- which was mostly Trump reading from a teleprompter, plus the expected weirdass asides -- nobody has identified it. He complained about the press and the crowd chanted "CNN sucks," and he explained what a threat to the nation Hillary Clinton is -- in fact, he mentioned her eight times during the 80-minute rant.

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Spinal Tap - Gimme Some Money

Some dick is suing your Wonkette! If you are able, will you please send money?

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