Donate

Exclusive! This Ad That Just Debuted On Breitbart, About Obama Bowing, Will Change Everything Forever This Time, For Real!

News

Dateline, Tampa Hyatt Lobby Bar -- David S. Bernstein, of the Boston Phoenix, just sat his ass down and made his FIRST mistake: telling your Wonkette he had found an exclusive. Then he made his second mistake, which was ... something else, whatever. Did you know David S. Bernstein does not know how to embed youtube videos? Good job, old media! Anyhoo, here is David S. Bernstein's EXCLUSIVE video, which we fucking helped him put on the Internet, because frankly we are lovely. It is about Special Ops dudes who are SO MAD that Barack Obama bows to everyone, all the time, forever, because he is a huge pussy who wants to sell America to Sharia law and Osamabinladensayswhat? Oh right nothing, the fish ate his mouth! See the anger and the glory:


Honestly, we kind of agree: sometimes Barry Bamz's bows do get a little too deep. Like the one in the picture at the top of this post, where he is selling out the entire planet to Zorubi, Boy King of Betelgeuse 3. Sorry everybody, there is no hiding from Betelgeuse 3.

UPDATE: Wouldn't you know it, the actual real Navy SEAL behind this ad turned out to be Ryan Zinke, who later became a congress person and then Trump's terrible Interior secretary, you are welcome.

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

$
Donate with CC
Seattle People, looking spunky. We hate spunky.

It is Friday, Yr Wonkette's back end (that's website talk) has been cranky all afternoon like a digital babby that needs a nap, and we are all stuck in the stupidest timeline. The one way we know it's not actually hell is that there are still adorable doggies and kitties and sloths, no to mention toddlers preschoolers named Donna Rose, and of course you, you lovely wonderful readers of ourn. And if you're in Eastern Washington or its environs, you can come out to meet Yr Editrix, Yr Shypixel, and Yr one day Benevolent Monarch Donna Rose come this Sunday in the Evergreen State's second-largest city, Spokane!

Keep reading... Show less
$
Donate with CC
$
Donate with CC
Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

  • Saturday, Aug 11th ....... Seattle, WA
    Discovery Park, 4-7pm
  • Sunday, Aug 12th ....... Bellingham, WA
    Sunnyland Park, 2-5pm
  • Sunday, Aug 19th ....... Spokane, WA
    Audubon Park, 2-5pm

Read More

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc