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'Full House' Child Star Candace Cameron Bure Gets Kinky And Submissive, For Jesus

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What's the deal with former child stars? Don't get us wrong, we know being a child star is a fucked-up life, but is the best way to solve it turning into a depressingly fervent Bible banger like Kirk Cameron or, apparently, his little sister Candace Cameron Bure, she of DJ Tanner in "Full House" fame? Yes, little DJ is all grown up and loves her some Jesus and defers to her man.


First you are totally stuck hearing about how she found Jesus because if we have to read it, you have to read it.

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Oh hey, Maria Butina the Russian spy lady, you are still in jail!

Butina, who was arrested Sunday for being a Russian spy who infiltrated the NRA in order to infiltrate the GOP for her motherland, is supposed to appear in court this afternoon, and in advance of that, prosecutors have filed a really fun motion listing all the reasons Butina should be required to STAY IN JAIL until her trial, at which point she will be found guilty as a common Paul Manafort and have to go to so much more jail. In short, it is because she is a major flight risk, but the document is a much better read than that, and it has boning. Shall we give it a look?

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The Ohio State University sex abuse scandal is one of those stories of such escalating repulsiveness that you think it's gone on forever, when it's only barely been two weeks. Former team doctor Richard Strauss is alleged to have sexually assaulted a minimum of 1,500/2000 student athletes from 1978 to 1998 in at least 15 varsity sports, one of which is wrestling, and Ohio Rep. Jim Jordan was assistant wrestling coach from 1986 to 1994, so there's some overlap there.

Jordan has repeatedly insisted that he "knew nothing" about all the sports-related rape and just sort of hopes the story will go away so he can't get back to helping bury the Russia investigation for his buddy Donald Trump. However, the victims of Strauss's unspeakable acts have different ideas.

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