Gay Marriage Fever Upgraded To Level 5
President Obama WON THE EVENING with his press conference, which closely resembled his many other press conferences in that he allowed exactly 13 questions. (Satan???!) [ Christian Science Monitor ]
A car in a Dutch parade crashed into the crowd and killed two people, but thankfully not their beloved Queen or other members of the royal family. [ BBC News ]
A woman has come forward and said that her father was the Zodiac killer (a fellow who went around murdering lovers in San Francisco and the Bay Area for a while there), but people say that all the time so nobody believes her. [ San Jose Mercury News ]
The state of New Hampshire fell victim to the Gay Marriage Flu sweeping the nation; its Senate and House have approved a marriage bill. Now they have to see if the governor will sign it. [ Boston Globe ]
An elementary school in Contra Costa County (that's in California) closed with lightning speed after some kids with the sniffles stayed home because duh, swine flu. [ San Francisco Chronicle ]
A building in lower Manhattan fell down and went boom, but no worries, the dummy who flew Barack Obama's jet into the Statue of Liberty was not to blame this time. [ New York Times ]