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Gay Marriage Passes in Maryland; Twitter Awaits Santorum's Reaction

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The Maryland Senate passed a bill allowing same-sex marriage that the House also passed last week, which the governor will now sign shortly, hooray! This makes Maryland the first state with a direct reference to Catholicism in its name to legalize gay marriage and the eighth state to do so overall, which immediately forced Virginia to also advance an anti-gay adoption bill today as a bulwark against common sense spreading any further south of the Mason-Dixon line. Twitter, meanwhile, is growing agitated that Rick Santorum has not yet issued a reaction that is gravely offensive to the basic principles of decency for it to mock. Come on, he did it for the Ninth Circuit ruling against California's Proposition 8! Did someone forget to put another quarter in the squawking toy clown's butt?

Comedy demands your imbecile response, Rick!

Let us also briefly note that some people are going to argue that gay rights activists "owe" zombie virus Dick Cheney a "thank you," because he reportedly privately lobbied a Maryland GOP legislator or two to vote for the bill. He has a gay daughter, remember? So those possessed of a short-term memory might think, "eh, he at least did one thing right" instead of doing the only possible moral thing whenever his name comes up, picturing an Iraqi toddler with her limbs blown off. The thank-you notes go to the legions of activists who work on these issues every day to support and advance gay marriage without engineering the murder of thousands of civilians or promoting torture and war crimes. [WaPo]

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If the facts are against you, argue the law. If the law is against you, argue the facts. If the law and the facts are against you, pound the table and yell like hell. And if that doesn't work, just make shit up.

Talking hairpiece Jay Sekulow went on Chris Cuomo's CNN show Wednesday night to barf out the latest Trumpland nonsense on the Russian WITCH HUNT. Remember way back in May, 2017 when Donald Trump told Lester Holt about that hilarious time he fired James Comey to murder the Russia investigation?

"I was going to fire Comey knowing there's no good time to do it. And in fact when I decided to just do it, I said to myself, I said, 'you know, this Russia thing with Trump and Russia is a made up story, it's an excuse by the Democrats for having lost an election that they should have won.'"

Did you think that meant he actually fired Comey TO MURDER THE RUSSIA INVESTIGATION? Watch and learn, kids!

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In the words of the great Tammy Wynette, sometimes it's hard to be a woman. This week has been such a time for many of us out there, what with the impending prospect of seeing yet another sex predator who wants to take away our reproductive rights getting confirmed to the highest court in the land. Oh, it's almost like we, and our bodily autonomy, don't even matter at all.

Thankfully, several conservative columnists have graciously taken the time to explain to the rest of us why we should stand by their man. Not for his good, but for our own. Because it will be empowering. So come on gals, let's switch out our sneakers for pumps like the the working gals in 1980s movies, set up our desk salads, and just really lean in to see what they have to say!

First up, we've got Catherine Glenn Foster over at The Federalist, who wants us to know that losing our reproductive rights will empower us beyond our wildest dreams, according to the actual title of her essay.

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