I know what you're thinking. Did she fire five shots or six? Well did I, punk? Be sure to show your work.

In Dalton, Georgia, a teacher was arrested today after police responded to a report of shots fired at Dalton High School, providing one possible answer to the question, "How will school safety be improved if we arm 20 percent of the nation's teachers as Donald Trump wants?"

The teacher, identified by the Dalton Police Department Twitter account as social studies teacher Jesse Randall Davidson, 53, reportedly barricaded himself in a classroom, fired a single shot, and was taken into custody after the school was placed in lockdown and evacuated. No students were injured by the gunfire, although police tweeted that one student "sustained an ankle injury running inside the school," which just goes to show you shouldn't panic.

The Times Free Press in nearby Chattanooga reports:

Randal Davidson, a social studies teacher who has been at the school since 2004, was alone in his room during his planning period, according to police. Around 11:30 a.m. a student tried to get inside and found the door was locked. A principal then tried to open it with a key, which is when Davidson fired through a window.

Police were called to the school as kids were evacuated to the gym and some locker rooms. Officers negotiated with him for 30 to 45 minutes before he turned himself in. [Still not clear whether it's Randall or Randal -- Dok Z]

It's unclear whether this was a negligent discharge or something more potentially horrific, and we're honestly hoping for "stupid accident," because Jesus, that's bad enough. Yr Wonkette is not a law enforcement or emergency tactical response expert, but we'll go out on a limb and suggest that, regardless of what happened in that classroom, having a whole bunch more armed teachers on the scene probably would not have helped.

As of this time, Donald Trump has not said whether he would have run into the school to confront the teacher, although local police certainly did:

"When you hear this kind of call go out, if you've got a badge, you run to it," said Bruce Frazier, spokesman for the Dalton Police Department. "Our people responded and coordinated in a very professional way."

It also does not appear the school was being watched over by any Oath Keeper loonies, so thank Crom for small mercies.

WSB TV reporter Chris Jose posted this video of students running from the school, taken by a DHS student:

After the school was evacuated, the Dalton Police's Twitter account advised parents to stay away from the school and instead to pick them up at the Northwest Georgia Trade and Convention Center, where they were taken after the evacuation.

The Times Free Press reports the Chattanooga region has seen a number of baseless social media threats about school shootings, following the February 14 school shooting in Florida, proving that people are goddamned idiots all around:

In one incident, a Ringgold, Ga., high school student is accused of making a new Snapchat account, sending herself a threatening message and passing it along to other students, making it look like she was the target of a dangerous plot [...]

Separately, a Chattanooga girl was charged with filing a false report after a meme parents perceived as a threat was circulated on social media Monday afternoon [...]

Authorities managed to track it to a juvenile who was identified as the creator of the meme. It was determined there was no real threat, but charges will be filed in juvenile court against the girl because her actions caused significant community alarm.

Those arrests came days after three Bradley County students were arrested for allegedly threatening to shoot up Bradley Central High School and another student was jailed after a social media threat against Meigs County High School. A spokesman for Rutherford County Schools also said false rumors had been spread to parents and students, but no credible threats were made.

So you've got a bunch of stupid teenagers spreading fake threats, a lot of nervous teachers and parents, a "president" calling for the very best teachers who are "very adept with firearms" to be allowed to carry concealed weapons in schools, and a gun lobby insisting that arming teachers is the best of all possible worlds.

Gosh, it's a total mystery how this situation in Georgia could have developed.

We suppose the next logical step is for Alex Jones to proclaim the teacher deliberately fired a gun harmlessly through the window because George Soros paid him to create a panic and shut down the effort to arm teachers before it even has a chance to work. Fortunately, there's no reason to think this sort of thing might ever happen again, because when a lot more teachers come to school packing guns, they'll all know that guns are dangerous and they'll be a lot more careful. That's just logical.

Yr Wonkette is supported by reader donations. Please click here to help us arm up and protect our My Little Pony collectibles.

[Chattanooga Times Free Press]

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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