Geraldo Rivera Is Trying To Keep Anthony Scaramucci From Losing His Shit, So That Is A Thing That Is Happening
Is there something on my nose?
When Geraldo is the voice of reason, maybe it's time to dial it back a notch? And maybe someone should explain the Streisand Effect to Donald Trump's biggest fan? Because we at this here mommyblog and recipe hub would never have known about Mooch's reported tête-à-tête with Fox lady Kimberly Guilfoyle if he weren't LOSING HIS SHIT about it online.
Simmer down, Ant'nee!
WE SAID, SIMMER DOWN!
We're guessing The Mooch is pissed that Page Six published this story yesterday at 5:17 PM:
Even though Anthony Scaramucci isn’t romancing Kimberly Guilfoyle anymore, they’re still on speaking terms.
A spy told Page Six that The Mooch and Guilfoyle were having what appeared to be an “intimate” conversation Thursday.
“They were standing inches apart,” the spy said, “and they were keeping their voices low.
“The conversation looked serious.”
Superfans of the Mooch may remember that his wife Deidre Ball filed for divorce when she was 9 months pregnant amid rumors of an affair between her husband and Gavin Newsom's ex-wife Kimberly Guilfoyle. They have since reconciled and appeared on Dr. Phil to marriagesplain their current state of wedded bliss to ... people stranded in the dentist's waiting room, we guess.
Not for nothing, but if you're taking marriage advice from Mr. and Mrs. Mooch or Dr. Phil, YOU'RE FUCKED.
Anyway, if Mooch weren't such a thin-skinned little whiner, shit-tweeting and calling up Page Six to scream at them, they might not have followed up with this story five hours later:
Short-lived and short-tempered White House communications director Anthony Scaramucci is angry again — and it isn’t because we learned he only got a $150,000 deal for his book about the president.
The Mooch is mad because he was spotted by Page Six having a “serious” conversation with his former paramour Kimberly Guilfoyle on Thursday.
(Pssst, Mooch! We think they're making fun of your height.)
It was then that noted tough guy Geraldo Rivera stepped in to give poor Moochie some fatherly advice.
Yeah, Mooch. BE COOL.
Her job is to write celebrity gossip. It's not like she's calling up Ryan Lizza to say, "I’m not Steve Bannon, I’m not trying to suck my own cock." That would be totally out of line! But please, tell us more about how you should definitely get hired back to the White House, Mooch. Because nothing says RESPONSIBLE ADULT WHO IS DEFINITELY NOT ON DRUGS like a shitfit on Twitter that makes Geraldo Rivera look like the voice of reason.
And now you've forced us to side with THIS GUY! Thanks a lot, Ant'nee!
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Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.