Gigantic Radical Homosexual Agenda Busy Tearing Holes In All The Bottoms (VIDEO)


Quick, everybody leave the engine on your Hummer running, all night, with the AC cranked! Sorry the Maldives, but we must use global warming to melt all the icebergs,because gays! Wait what? Oh, humanity is the Titanic, and gays are the iceberg that murders the Titanic. But what does that make Leonardo DiCaprio? It makes him Jesus ("King" of the "World," amirite?) dying for Kate Winslet's sins. And who is the drunken captain? (John Boehner.) (Oh wait, that was the Exxon Valdez.) (Did the Titanic have a drunken captain? If you have seen the movie, could you let us know?) What about that captain in Italy who refused to go back on the ship and help save all his passengers? (He is Barack Obama, probably, because he was a shiftless pussy.)

Metaphors are hard, you guys. Here, watch RightWingWatch's video, and make some "metaphors" of your own!

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Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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