God Supporting Santorum, Bachmann & Cain ... Because of Holy Trinity?

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Almighty God is apparently supporting the presidential ambitions of three GOP candidates, which is going to be awkward because God's Law, the U.S. Constitution, only allows for one president (and one vice president, who exists only so God can choose to take the real president to Heaven, for sexytime). Anyway, according to a New York magazine investigation, the American God told bug-eyed dumb-bot Michele Bachmann, pizza pizza man Herman Cain and fetus-fetish loser Rick Santorum they should all run for president.


God hasn't been universally generous with his support. He went out of his way to let Mike Huckabee know that he shouldn't run for president, lest he take his focus off the much more important task of producing a series of conservative American history DVDs.

God is so old and dumb, he doesn't even know about the Blu-Ray or whatever. [New York Magazine]

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