GOP Finally Reveals New Idea: Look! Ladies! Look At All These Ladies!
Ever since the GOP announced its latest new rebranding plan -- Ideas! We're Going To Have Some! -- we have been on the edge of our seat waiting to find out what their Ideas! will be. And thanks to this new failtastically funny ad, now we know. It is chicks, man. But in the good way.
We're the party that believes in opportunity. The party of empowerment. We're the change-is-needed party. The highly motivated party. The party that encourages everyone to engage in their communities. We’re the take-the-initiative party. The party that won’t give up. Because this election is too important. There’s too much at stake. This year, Republican women are taking back the future.
Awwww, isn't that so cute? Despite what you might have heard about how the Republican Party is not so good with the ladies, actually, and how all the single ladies especially are like, "Uh, no, we will never vote for you because you guys who are mostly all guys SUCK" -- well, do not believe it. There are lady Republicans, and ladies who like Republicans, and you can see every single one of them in this ad for ladies, by ladies, about ladies, because ladies, also LADIES.
This is exactly the kind of positive, feel-good, makes-you-wanna-buy-some-SHOOOOOOOZ rebranding that Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus was sort of hinting at when he announced the new NEW NEW NEW plan: "People know what we’re against. I want to talk about the things we’re for."
Other than that one little hiccup the other day when Priebus was all, like, "No, man, we are still totally against gay marriage, don't be stupid," plus a casual threat to shut down the whole government again unless Congress repeals Obamacare because they are still very much against that too, the party is leaving all of that being against stuff behind. Now it is for opportunity! And empowerment! And change! And the future! And it will definitely close that pesky gender gap that somehow just keeps getting bigger ... and bigger ... and bigger ...