GOP Rep. Justin Amash Beheads Opponents, Poos Down Their Necks In Awesome Bloodthirsty Victory Speech


Might want to think twice about primarying Rep. Justin Amash (R - Iron Isles), as he will stride to the podium for his victory speech and call you, your mother, everyone you ever met, and Pete Hoekstra a disgusting un-American piece of shit.

Let's get straight to the kumbayas, shall we?

"You owe my family and this community an apology for your disgusting, despicable smear campaign. You had the audacity to try and call me today after running a campaign that was called the nastiest in the country. I ran for office to stop people like you."

[Primary challenger Brian] Ellis in one ad referred to a quote from Rep. Devin Nunes (R-Calif.), who labeled Amash "Al Qaeda's best friend in Congress."

Maybe Justin Amash should have thought twice before being Arab-American!

But what about former congressdouche Pete Hoekstra, who supported Ellis's campaign?

"You are a disgrace. And I'm glad we could hand you one more loss before you fade into total obscurity and irrelevance."

So that was fun! We mean, it's no Alison Lundergan Grimes calling Mitch McConnell a useless fucktard to his useless fucktard old face, but that'll do, Amash. That'll do.


Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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