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Gossip Roundup: Attention Kerry Campaign Washouts: Hillary Is Hiring

· The Glover Park Group runs deep, as Hillary Clinton beefs up staff. Big-haired Glover Park Grouper Lorrie McHugh-Wytkind said to be tapped to handle media strategy, former Clinton Deputy Press Secretary and campaign-hopping Deaniac-turned-Kerrynaut and fellow Glover Parkite Sarah Gegenheimer to handle communications. [Rush & Molloy]


· Capitol Club hosts Reagan book signing; Tom Ford look-a-like Eric Dezenhall, Reagan Ranch Board of Governors head Frank Donatelli, columnist R. Emmett Tyrrell, American Conservative Union's David Keene and recent Homeland Security resignee Asa Hutchinson attend. Boy that must have been some party, we bet the laughter never stopped. [Reliable Source]

· Senator Chuck Schumer's wife does not, repeat, does not curse out "commoners" in parking lots. [Page Six]

· Arnold Schwarzenegger: reads Austrian newspapers daily, still retains ability to speak German. Now that's gossip.[Cindy Adams]

· West Wing's John Spencer confuses TV set with actual Oval Office. [Boldface Names]

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It's the night before the two-night Democratic primary debate extravaganza, and we're already tired. Turns out having 20 candidates spread across two nights when only six or eight of them matter is not the must-see TV we all thought it was going to be! But that's not to dissuade you from getting excited! We're excited! We're so excited! We're so ...

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SCARED!

In case you need a reminder, here is how it's going to go down:

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Lately he's been blowing smoke from another orifice.

After a cursory examination of the TWELVE filings in the case against California Congressman Duncan Hunter just in the past 24 hours, we can confidently declare that that guy is a fucking idiot. The prosecutors have him by every last one of his short and curlies -- which is what happens when you use your campaign credit card to pay for hundreds of thousands of dollars of ski trips, video games, tuition, and plane tickets for the family rabbit.

A rational human being would have pleaded down a year ago and given up his congressional seat, since he could cash out and make a lot more money as a lobbyist anyway. But not Duncan Hunter! He made the federal government chase him down and document every last carton of cigarettes, round of tequila, and Uber ride of shame home from his many girlfriends' houses in a 60-count indictment filed last August. And still this dumb sumbitch refused to admit he was caught, even after his lovely wife (and co-conspirator) Margaret Hunter flipped on him this month -- which is what happens when you use your campaign credit card to carry on multiple affairs and you piss off the US Attorneys enough that they put every 7 a.m. Uber ride in your indictment.

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