Gossip Roundup: What Our Intern Did When He Should Have Been Registering for Classes Edition

Heard on the Hill:Ed Henry's last column: "Thank you first to my 535 joke writers (to paraphrase a line from comedian Mark Russell.) If you think I have been even a little funny, it'�s only because of the 100 Senators and 435 House Members who have given me such rich material on the lighter side of Capitol Hill. . . You could not possibly make this stuff up. In a way, I�ve simply been eavesdropping on the ultimate reality show � and I hope you�ve enjoyed some of the episodes. . . All-time favorites include Kennedy's 'Stockpile Stewardess Program,' DeLay's battle with a fly, and the world-famous 'You Suck' email." [Roll Call]

Inside the Beltway:Lieberman: "I thought the Ted Kennedy reference to Vietnam was not appropriate.". . . Carter: "President Bush's war was ill-advised and unnecessary and based on erroneous statements, and has turned out to be a tragedy." DeLay: "I'm just glad President Carter wasn't in charge after Valley Forge, Bull Run or Pearl Harbor.". . . Kerry, last year: "If America is at war, I won't speak a word [criticizing the president] without measuring how it'll sound to the guys doing the fighting when they're listening to their radios in the desert." [WT]

The Scoop: 12,000 Martha Stewart fans petition Bush for a pardon. . . Pink writes to the Advocate: "But if you happen to be reasonably minded and have fallen in love and wanna marry your soul mate and make a life of it, and you just so happen to be the same sex, then NO! How dare you! You demon creatures! We�d rather you just buy gasoline and support our war and continue to consume and fear in our country so we can make money off you. But do us a favor � don�'t hold hands in public. Love, Pink." (Subtle, that Pink.) [MSNBC]

Lloyd Grove's Lowdown: Who will get the Clinton interview when his memoir is released? A prime-time special with Oprah? Says his attorney, "There's also interest in virtually every major country in the world, who all want prime-time interviews. I have yet to hear from other planets, but nothing would surprise me." [NYDN]

Rush & Molloy:Bruckheimer: "But eventually we'll realize that we did the right thing by removing a brutal dictator. I know I'm in the minority, but I like Bush.". . . Reiner: "I think this is worse than Vietnam because in Vietnam you could pull out. In Iraq, we're stuck in a situation we've created.". . . Kerry's Wednesday night in New York will bring in over $5 million. . . Hillary, Jeffords, Stevens, and Enzi joined Schumer for planet-gazing on the Dirksen roof. [NYDN]

Daily Dish: On "SNL," Janet Jackson as Condi flashes the 9/11 panel: "I am not a prude, sir, but this hearing is not the forum for that kind of lewd conduct." [NYDN]

Cindy Adams:Condi pushed out? "And you'll suddenly hear phrases like: She's tired of the rat race, needs to have a life, been in politics too long, always wanted to be a football commissioner, always wanted to be a wife and mother, always wanted a villa in Malta, etc., etc., and blah blah. Is what they're saying." [NYP]

Page Six:Paula Jones marketing a new book, "I Said 'No!': A Case File of Sexual Harassment". [NYP]


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