Grassley And Graham Star In 'How Dare Susan Rice Catch Michael Flynn Committing These Crimes!'
Hooray! Congress just dropped more episodes in the long-running drama series, HOW DARE YOU CATCH ME COMMITTING ALL THESE CRIMES! This week, Senators Chuck Grassley and Lindsey Graham are calling out Susan Rice, who is notorious for being female and professional and black. Egads!
If you liked the "Unmasking" story arc where they raked Rice over the coals for trying to figure out which Trump team official was whispering with the Russian ambassador to get sanctions lifted, you'll LOVE the new season. Plot twist: This time they'll be screaming because Rice didn't tell Trump associates that they were under investigation!
The Senators are flogging an email which Susan Rice sent to herself on January 20, 2017, the day of Trump's inauguration. Almost like Rice was deliberately leaving a permanent record which could never be deleted! The email details a meeting on January 5 where James Comey, Sally Yates, and Rice herself briefed Obama and Vice President Biden on the Steele Dossier and the investigation into Trumpland's various Russian entanglements. Or as Chuck and Lindsey put it,
It strikes us as odd that, among your activities in the final moments on the final day of the Obama administration, you would feel the need to send yourself such an unusual email purporting to document a conversation involving President Obama and his interactions with the FBI regarding the Trump/Russia investigation.
Why yes, it was ODD! But not half as odd as handing the National Security Advisor portfolio off to Michael Flynn knowing that he'd been picked up having clandestine negotiations with the Russian Ambassador on multiple occasions and then lied about it to the press. Odd is knowing that routine opposition research has kicked up evidence of money laundering, financial entanglements with a foreign power, and susceptibility to blackmail by the incoming POTUS.
Gosh, why wouldn't the outgoing administration want to share classified information on Russia with people who were having backchannel communications with the Russian ambassador every other day? SO WEIRD! Unfortunately, that doesn't fit with Senator Cornhole's narrative that it is ILLEGAL to investigate your political opponent when he is committing a crime.
Rice continued in her email to Rice,
The President stressed that he is not asking about, initiating or instructing anything from a law enforcement perspective. He reiterated that our law enforcement team needs to proceed as it normally would by the book.
From a national security perspective, however, President Obama said he wants to be sure that, as we engage with the incoming team, we are mindful to ascertain if there is any reason that we cannot share information fully as it relates to Russia.
Sure he said they should do everything "by the book." But what if Obama actually meant something else entirely! Lucky thing Grassley and Graham have an active fantasy life and can bring themselves to corngasm just by imagining Barack Obama doing something dirrrrrty.
And then there was a big old redacted section.
So, who might be behind that door? Could it be Michael "Lock Her Up" Flynn, the guy who recently pleaded guilty to lying to the FBI? The one Barack Obama explicitly warned Donald Trump was a security risk? The one who Sally Yates told Don McGahn repeatedly had been compromised by making false statements to the FBI? The one who plotted with the Turks to kidnap a 75-year-old cleric from Pennsylvania and black helicopter him out of the country?
Ayup! Per WaPo,
On Jan. 5, FBI Director James B. Comey, CIA Director John Brennan and Director of National Intelligence James R. Clapper Jr. briefed Obama and a small group of his top White House advisers on the contents of a classified intelligence report showing that Russia intervened in the 2016 election to help Trump. That’s when White House officials learned that the FBI was investigating the Flynn-Kislyak calls. “The Flynn-Kislyak relationship was highlighted,” a former senior U.S. official said, adding that the bureau made clear “that there was an actual investigation” underway.
Senators Graham and Grassley are mad that the White House didn't want to tell Michael Flynn the details of an investigation into ... Michael Flynn. So now these paragons of integrity have some questions for the little lady.
For one thing, they want to know if she drafted that email all by herself. And did she also think of it all on her own? Because they are giant, flaming misogynist dicks.
Did anyone instruct, request, suggest, or imply that you should send yourself the aforementioned Inauguration Day email memorializing President Obama' s meeting with Mr. Corney about the Trump/Russia investigation? If so, who and why?
Then they had one million questions about the Steele Dossier and warrants on Carter Page. Which are, naturally, ILLEGAL because after investigating Trump's one million money laundering schemes, Chris Steele didn't like Donald Trump. Gotta say, this show may have jumped the shark. It's like they're just recycling material from last year and hoping we won't notice.
Anyway, tune in next week to find out if the good senators finally prove once and for all that there is NO RUSSIA only DEEP STATE OBAMA meddling and FRUIT OF THE POISON TREE!!!!
(Spoiler Alert: No, they won't.)
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Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.