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Grizzled Old Coot Will Be Oklahoma's Next Democratic Senator

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Your Wonkette takes its mandate to keep you abreast of any and all wacky political candidates seriously! So today we introduce you to your new boyfriend, assuming you like old dudes who wear baseball caps and have gross-looking beards. Jim Rogers has run for the Democratic Senate nomination in Oklahoma four times, and we all know that the fourth time is the charm, so now he is your nominee. And come November, Tom Coburn's reign of terror will be over!


What was it that finally put Rogers over the top? Was it his principled, thoughtful stands on issues that are important to Oklahoma voters, as reported by Oklahoma City's News 9?

Was it his tireless campaigning across the state and networking with party leaders that allowed him to beat attorney Mark Myles?

In past campaigns, Rogers hasn't attended forums or debates. Party leaders say their conversations with Rogers have been few and they don't know how to reach him.

"I kept telling people I was running against a ghost," Myles said. "I knew Mr. Rogers wasn't campaigning, but I had to overcome his name recognition."

...

"I put about 8,000 miles on my car and just ran out of time before I could get to all the places I wanted to get to. I was very well received by the audiences I talked to," Myles said.

Hmm, name recognition, you say?

"Names matter," said Ben Odom, an attorney and longtime political consultant. "If you're going to run for office in Oklahoma, you can't have a better name than Rogers."

Some may have assumed Rogers was related to Oklahoma's own Will Rogers, the 1930s performer and political pundit, he said.

Jim Rogers is not in fact related to Will Rogers, although he is like Will Rogers in that he doesn't have a website. But who needs a website when you have an enormous sign that you can hold up in the direction of oncoming traffic -- a sign that, as near as we can tell, declares that "US MILITARY PD TINKER AFB USPS VETERANS FDX UPS TAX PAYERS OHP TRUCKERS OPE [...] CHURCH?"

Unlike Will Rogers, Jim Rogers has a Facebook account. Make him your friend, if you dare! Then report back to your Wonkette what happens on his page, as we are too afraid to try it. [News9/The Oklahoman/Jim Rogers Facebook]

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'Bella" by Wonkette Operative 'IdiokraticSubpoenaKommissar'

Sunday already, which means a substantial portion of US America is preparing to be astonished/heartbroken/outraged by the series finale of that show with the dragons, while another portion is just going to stay off Twitter for three days because nothing will make any sense. Yr Dok Zoom tends to come very late to trendy things, so get ready for our own thoughts on the gamy thrones show sometime in about 2023, or never. But we'd be glad to tell you just how much we enjoy the brilliance and humanity of the Cartoon Network series "Steven Universe," which debuted in 2013 and we started bingeing on the Hulu last month, late again.

Hell, we still want to talk about that one Mrs Landingham episode of "The West Wing," which we first watched years after it aired (We finally bought our new used car yesterday, and know one thing: don't drive over to the White House to show it off to President Bartlet). We might even get around to reading Infinite Jest someday. We hear it has something to do with a superhero team and a guy named Thanos. So hey, let's talk about culture and missing out and patching together some knowledge of what's happening anyway.

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Get Me Roger Stone

Roger Stone, his wife would like you to know, is broke. And he is not dealing with it well. Once in khaki suits, gee, he looked swell, full of that yankee-doodle-dee-dum, but now no one calls him Al anymore and he has to stand on a street corner singing "Brother Can You Spare A Dime?"

Yesterday, the conservative but also kind of Never Trumper site The Bulwark revealed the details of a grifty "fundraising" plea sent out by Stone's wife Nydia, begging supporters to give money to the Stones in order to help them keep up the lifestyle to which they have become accustomed.

It was titled "I am embarrassed to write this."

"Dear Friend," begins the missive. "My husband and I have an urgent new problem and we need your help. I told my husband I was going to write you, one of his most valued supporters. I am embarrassed to write this, but I must."

"Mrs. Roger Stone" tells a tale of woe: FBI agents swooping in on them at the crack of dawn to arrest her husband, a subsequent "fake news" feeding frenzy causing friends and fans to abandon the Stones.

"He laid off all our consultants, contractors and employees, and we have 'pulled in our belts' like so many Americans in 'tight times,'" she wrote, sounding for all the world like a plucky working-class patriot, not the wife of a man who made and lost his fortune lying in the service of power.

She should have been more embarrassed.

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