Nice Time

Washington State's 'Joints For Jabs' Vaccine Incentive Way Better Than  'Maui Wowie For Your Owie'

Or 'BONG HITS 4 FAUCI.'

The state of Washington has rolled out a new incentive for people to get the coronavirus vaccine: Get a shot, and get a free marihuana cigarette, or "joint," as the hopheads and jazz musicians call it. The state Liquor and Cannabis Board authorized the "Joints for Jabs" promotion, which will allow cannabis dispensaries to give people over 21 who get vaccinated at in-store clinics one pre-rolled joint for either their first or second vaccination, no not both. No edibles or other products, either, sorry.

The promotion is aimed at getting the state's percentage of adults who've had at least one shot up to 70 percent. Because the state and federal tallies use different criteria, it seems a weekend tweet saying the goal had been reached was in error: The federal count looks at folks aged 18 and up, but Washington bases its figure on people 16 and up. By that method, Washington's only at 64 percent. Once that goal is reached, the state can really start reopening and getting back to normal, according to Gov Jay (HA HA, HIS NAME IS "JAY" AND ITS A WEED STORY!) Inslee.

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Class War

You Know What Everyone Loves? Paid Leave!

Yes, even Republicans.

What does the United States have in common with Kiribati, the Marshall Islands, Micronesia, Nauru, Palau and Tonga? Well, it is not that we are a small island nation, that is for sure. No, it's that we're the only countries in the world without sick leave or vacation leave. The United States, Papua New Guinea, Suriname and "a few South Pacific island nations" are the only countries that don't have paid parental leave of any kind.

That is something a large majority of Americans would like to change and have supported changing for some time now, and yet another poll has shown that there is extremely high support for it, including among Republicans.

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Right Wing Extremism

Freakshow Idaho Lt. Gov. Lady Bans Mask Mandates While Real Gov Out Of State, And He's *Piiiiissed*

Why yes, she IS running against him in the R primary.

Last week, Idaho's wackaloon Lieutenant Governor Janice McGeachin, who likes to hang out with anti-government militias and pretends she's some sort of freedom fighter by opposing public health measures, decided that while Gov. Brad Little was out of the state, she'd just fuck around and find out if she could bring LIBERTY to Idaho.

Little had gone to a Republican Governors Association conference in Nashville, and Idaho's state constitution says that when the governor leaves the state, they are no longer governor. So last Thursday, McGeachin issued a batshit crazy executive order prohibiting all state "political subdivisions" (other than nursing homes and hospitals) from mandating face masks.

As the Idaho Capital Sun 'splained, the order applied to all Idaho "public schools, counties, cities and public health districts. It also extends to state boards, commissions, departments and divisions." McGeachin said she hadn't checked with schools or informed them of the order before issuing it.

The first that Gov. Little heard of the order was right after he'd spoken at the RGA meeting, when he got a call from Secretary of State Lawrence Denney, the Capital Sun reported yesterday.

"He says, "Brad, I've got an executive order here,'" Little said in a lengthy interview [...] in his office Tuesday morning.

"That's when I first found out about it."

Little returned to Boise last Thursday night, and on Friday morning issued a new executive order undoing McGeachin's craziness. As of yesterday afternoon, the governor and the lieutenant governor hadn't spoken. In Idaho, the two officers are elected separately; they don't run together on a party ticket. It being Idaho, you're gonna have Republicans in both slots anyway. Idaho does have a two-party system, however: There are conservative Republicans like Little, and then there are bonkers whackjob far-Right Republicans like McGeachin.

This latest madness makes us wonder whether someday, the madness in the Idaho Republican Party will get so bad that voters turn away from the Rs. If they do, they'd still probably elect a Whig before a Democrat.

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coronavirus

Ohio Bill To Ban Vax Lotteries, Free Vax Donuts, Saying 'Vaccine' Unless You Turn Around 3 Times And Spit

Biz, government, insurers, all persons may not require or suggest you get a vaccine.

Ohio announced its first winner of the Vax-A-Millions lottery Wednesday. Abbey Bugenske of Cincinnati was on her way to buy a used car when she got the call telling her she'd won, so we hope she decided to go ahead and get the extended warranty. California is following Ohio's lead, designating $116.5 million for vaccine incentives, including a $15 million cash prize that'll be split by 10 lucky people who've gotten vaccinated.

And West Virginia Gov. Jim Justice released a video featuring his bulldog "Baby Dog," advising residents that "she wants you vaccinated, I want you vaccinated, and I want a bunch of you to win all this stuff," by which he means the state's own incentive giveaway of cash prizes, 10 pickup trucks, and college scholarships.

Justice also explained, "I wouldn't dink around with this. I'd go get myself a shot. There's going to be so many wonderful prizes that you can win, it'll blow you away." But mostly, you should do it for this face:

Yes, Baby Dog has her own Twitter account.

So that's the encouraging vaccination news today, thanks for reading and have a great wee ... oh shit, there's also this Ohio fuckery we have to talk about. While Gov. Mike DeWine brags about how the lottery announcement has actually increased rates of vaccination that had been slacking off, Republicans in the Ohio General Assembly have introduced legislation that would largely eliminate vaccination mandates — or even requests or suggestions — across the state.

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