Who needs more coffee? And donuts? You, you over there, you were supposed to bring the donuts.

  • BREAKING!!! Stop the presses (or the pixels, whatever):

    Hello Kitty is not a cat. She's a cartoon character. She is a little girl. She is a friend. But she is not a cat. She's never depicted on all fours. She walks and sits like a two-legged creature. She does have a pet cat of her own, however, and it's called Charmmy Kitty.

    Now you know.

  • You know who else liked Nazis?

    From brown curry served in a toilet-shaped bowl to phallic-shaped popsicles, Taiwan has no shortage of wacky eats. But an Italian restaurant in New Taipei City has crossed the line from creative to outright offensive, and has come under fire for naming a dish “Long Live the Nazis.”

    “When we were deciding on a name for this pasta dish, it never occurred to us that the word Nazi would stir up such controversy,” said Chao Ya-hsin, the 24-year-old manager of the Rockmill restaurant, who offered a sorrowful apology over the restaurant’s lack of sensitivity.

    But look, it's not like there isn't a perfectly reasonable reason.

    Ms. Chao said the purpose of the original name “was simply to help customers” make the German connection to the pasta dish, in which German sausage is the primary ingredient.

    So now you know that too.

  • Remember that time Michele Bachmann thought she was going to be president, and that didn't happen? And remember how as soon as her mouth-breathing fans realized that, they ran away faster than Marcus runs for a sale on doggie sunglasses? Well, here's a little tidbit for us all to fondly remember and enjoy:

    A former Iowa lawmaker has pleaded guilty to federal charges stemming from his switch of support from one Republican candidate for president to another before the 2012 caucuses, federal prosecutors said Wednesday.

    Former state Sen. Kent Sorenson received thousands of dollars in "under the table payments" before switching loyalties from U.S. Rep. Michele Bachmann, whose state campaign he headed in Iowa, to then-U.S. Rep. Ron Paul, and then lying to federal investigators about the money, according to the U.S. Department of Justice. Prosecutors refused to say which campaign paid him.

So what else do all y'all know today?

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