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Heroic Ex-Wonkette Sugar Mama Says Thing Based In Reality

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Campbell Brown, whose enormous face we splattered all over this site in exchange for money, what, two-three years ago now?, is quitting her CNN show! This is largely because of her failure to defeat O'Reilly, Olbermann, and Nancy Grace in the ratings, but, because she is a high-powered media type, and they never admit defeat of any kind, ever, we're guessing she's going to purport to want to spend more time with her kids, "Eli" and "Asher." Wait, WHAT?


The simple fact is that not enough people want to watch my program, and I owe it to myself and to CNN to get out of the way so that CNN can try something else.

Also, on competing with those three monsters:

Shedding my own journalistic skin to try to inhabit the kind of persona that might coexist in that line up is simply impossible for me. It is not who I am or who I want to be; nor is it who CNN asked me to be at any point.

Aw, shucks. Farewell, Campbell! Your Wonkette Wednesday and Friday morning editor doesn't have cable and has never seen your show, but those two sentences make you seem vaguely reasonable! (P.S.: This is not any kind of indictment of the value of Wonkette advertising. ALL NEWS MEDIA COMPANIES MUST BUY ADS ON WONKETTE CONSTANTLY IF THEY HOPE TO SURVIVE.) [NYT]

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Ann Coulter is not impressed with Donald Trump's presumptuous plan to stop ripping babies away from their mothers and sending them to infant prison. For quite a while, Ann has been obsessively lamenting the very idea that American people even have children to "fill their lives with joy," but now (lol, "now") Ann has shifted her rage to immigrant people. Every time you watch her waving her alien-length arms around in a ritualistic frenzy over how shitty liberals are, just remember that we have already seen the emptiness of her soul laid bare. Remember that time she wanted to eat your baby because you got a tax credit?

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Screenshot- Right Wing watch via Fox News
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It's just another Wednesday in an America that snatched kids from their parents and locked them up in old Walmarts. Trump just signed an unneeded executive order ending his heinous child separation policy, but his "the bad guy mobster in a mobster movie" tactics might've had some permanent damage. What remains of the shriveled-up soul of the grand old poor-screwing Republican party has finally had enough.

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