Hey Pissed-Off High School Kids! These Colleges Want YOU (To Tell Your Principal To Fuck Off And Go Protest Guns)
This is what "college" looks like.
WHAT DID WONKETTE SAY? WAS WONKETTE RIGHT? Second question first, obviously Wonkette is always right. And what Wonkette said last week, in a post that went viral, is that if you are a high school student who wants to speak out for your right to not get mowed down in a hail of gunfire during AP Latin, and you are not fortunate enough to go to a school where the administrators support you in exercising your Constitutional rights and are threatening to suspend or otherwise punish you for doing so, you need to DO IT THE FUCK ANYWAY. We said, hey, suffer the "consequences" of getting suspended for three days, and use that time to call the ACLU and also catch up on your "Judge Hatchett," we do not care.
We also said that if they're lying and saying it will go on your PERMANENT RECORD (pssssssst, kids, that "permanent record" doesn't actually exist in grown-up world) and that your misbehaving will keep you out of a good college, call their fucking bluff, because it's not true.
BuzzFeed has compiled a list of schools that have issued statements that specifically say, "When Wonkette is right, DAMN, Wonkette is right! If you get in big trouble mister for exercising your Constitutional rights, that will not affect your prospects for getting in to our school!" (OK, to be more clear, it was only Harvard and Yale that specifically mentioned Wonkette in their statements. OK just kidding none of them did, but they would have if they had ever READ A BOOK.)
Since BuzzFeed went to the trouble of collecting all the tweets from all the schools, we won't reproduce them here. Instead, we'll steal like four tweets, then link you to two big and growing lists of schools all over the US and A who are affirming kids' rights to speak their damn minds. Then we will make like a common BuzzFeed and show you 14 donkeys who can't even deal with school superintendents and principals being fucking dicks about this. That good? Tweets. Links. Donkeys.
Here's Yale, MIT, Boston University and Tulane:
BuzzFeed also has Brown, Smith, UCLA, University of Connecticut and SO MANY MORE. Click here for a list that's got over a hundred schools that agree with yr Wonkette, including Rhodes College in our very own home town of Memphis. (Good job, Rhodes!) Here's another list!
Seriously, kids, any real school will never penalize you for something like this. Honest. The real world just doesn't work like that. So get out there and kick some ass (peacefully!) and if the fascist dickwad superintendent of your school district gives you shit, tell them Wonkette will FIGHT THEM BEHIND THE GYM AFTER THIRD PERIOD.
Now, as promised, these 14 donkeys. The first one is specifically reacting to your dumb school principal who thinks he can punish you for exercising your First Amendment rights:
We feel like these donkeys have made their point.
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