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The wingnuttosphere is up in arms -- concealed, openly carried, and hidden in the underwear drawer where their kids will never find them -- over an "invasive" survey that some Texas high school journalists put together to gather information on whether students' families owned guns and what their beliefs on regulation of guns were. Or as this headline from a gunhumping blog howled:

SO SCARY! OBAMA'S BEHIND IT!!!

Credit where it's due -- The Blaze actually took the time to find out what was going on before freaking out that Hendrickson High School in Pflugerville, Texas, was part of a sinister plot to register and then seize all the parents' guns. According to a school district spokeswoman, the survey was distributed by the student journalists to other students -- about 100 of them -- as part of a story the students were working on for the high school paper. The survey was done without the knowledge of administrators, and was not, as some of the more panicky blog stories claimed, mandatory. Here's what all the fuss was about:

That's not a bad survey, as high school surveys go

Our Secret Wonket Operative in Pflugerville writes,

People are freaking out all over Facebook. And they are preparing for the commie liberals to pry their guns out of their cold dead hands [...]

The thing that most of these websites fail to mention (although the Blaze sort of glossed over it) is that the principal sent out an email [Reproduced on the school's website -- Dok Zoom] saying that it was for a journalism project (the kids wanted to write an article in the school newspaper about gun rights and gun violence) and that it was NOT put out by the school district or administration. No one is trying to make a database of your precious guns or take them away.

Well, that's just what you've been programmed to think, because your mind has been corrupted by this ugly vile little snark mob! Besides, as we all know, any information-gathering by any entity -- from census takers to doctors -- is clearly an invasive attempt to destroy our LIBERTY and do mind control on our children.

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Clearly, our Pflugerville correspondent hasn't considered the obvious fact, as an article at Alex Jones' Home For Constant Panic points out, that innocent high school students are being coerced into finking on their parents:

[T]he survey can be used against the student and his family.

“Have you or anyone in your family ever used a gun in a self-defense situation?” another question asks. “If so, please describe.”

That question is particularly alarming because there’s no statue [sic] of limitation prohibiting an anti-gun prosecutor from charging someone with murder for using a gun in self-defense.

And Child Protective Services could also use the survey as a pretext to take kids away from a family.

Also, the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms is increasingly partnering with public schools and sheriff departments and its agents could use the answers provided in a school gun survey to target parents with help from local officials.

Overall, the survey follows an emerging trend by public schools to probe their students’ private lives.

The web link proving that schools are teaming up with the ATF to "target parents" goes to an overview of ATF's anti-gang outreach programs.

Since these were high school students, we suppose they haven't actually had any lectures on how to write a disclaimer to please a university's Human Subjects Committee -- it might have reassured parents a little if the paper had included a note that the survey was for a journalism class (with the teacher's and the student journalists' names and contact info, even?), that individual answers would be kept anonymous, and that the self-defense stories would only be used with permission, and with no identifying information. And sure, "Name and grade" should have been left off, for the sake of anonymity. Then again, this being Texas, maybe that wouldn't have helped at all.

Needless to say, gun-humpers were ANGRY and OUTRAGED at this UNCONSTITUTIONAL infringement of their rights, as a glance at the Facebook page of a pro-gun radio show that publicized the story shows.

  • Outrageous! Id send it back blank and written sideways in huge black letters over the top: NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!!
  • Answer the form with a single .556 bullet hole on the Fun slot. Maybe a second hole next to Freedom
  • And Pflugerville ISD will turn it over so your family can be fined, prosecuted or added to some list. Wow!
  • This is complete bs not only does it violate the 2nd amendment but its also violates personal privacy and is used to probe children for information about their parents. They've been doing these things in school for a while now.
  • This is a repeat of history they did this very thing in nazi germany before ww11
  • Doesn't matter if its a journalistic survey it crosses the line. This wouldn't be answered in my home. And this is the reason that any poll similar to it is not accurate. Who in their right mind would respond truthfully to something like it?

And even after the explanation in The Blaze that the survey was produced by high school students researching a story on attitudes toward gun ownership, a lot of commenters insisted that the liberal teachers had to have put them up to it, since no high school student would ever think to ask questions about a politically divisive issue. We're not sure where those folks went to high school; possibly Don't Question Me Or I'll Beat You homeschool. Also too, our Wonkette Operative in Pflugerville notes they find it amusing that

these idiots have no problem responding with, “They’ll meet the barrel of my gun” comments when we are talking about petty theft in the neighborhood, but they are freaking out over someone asking if they have guns. Um, you volunteer that information on a public forum every single day!

In any case, now the student journalists have something to write about: "How We Tried To Do A Journalism And Got Called Communists."

[The Blaze, via tip from an Alert Wonkette Operative in Pflugerville / InfoWars / America's Freedom Fighters]

Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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Once upon a time... about ten years ago, a group of entirely ridiculous men burst onto the scene wearing stupid hats and telling men that wearing stupid hats and telling men that walking up to women in bars and insulting ("negging") them would get them laid. This did not last long, as women also had televisions and computers and were completely aware of these tricks as well, so when some ass came up to us in a bar and said "Hey, nice nails, are they real?" we would laugh and laugh and loudly announce "Oh my god, this guy just tried to neg me! Can you believe that shit? HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY JUST TRIED TO NEG ME!" and then refer to him as "Mystery" the whole night.

Most of the men who tried that shit only did so a few times before realizing that it wasn't going to work, and thus moved on to other things. Perhaps things that did not involve furry hats and coming off as a huge creep. We may never know, because I would assume that those who tried it are now extremely embarrassed and would never, ever admit to this to us.

Still, there were a few men willing to eat that shit up, as well as some grifters willing to take advantage of that. Said grifters tended to be extremely misogynistic and seemed more like they were teaching men how to be as despised by women as they were than teaching them how to actually be liked by women.

Some of them, like Roosh V, a creepy weirdo who actually does live in his mom's basement, actively encouraged men to rape women who were intoxicated to the point of being obviously unable to consent.

However, even that branch of the PUA tree is wilting away. Many "self-help" style PUA forums like Nextasf and RSDnation are shutting down or have already shut down. In March, Chateau Heartiste, a batshit crazy PUA turned White Nationalist/Alt-Right blog was shut down by Wordpress. This week, rape advocate Roosh V (whom you may recall once called yours truly a "Wonkette typist/clown face, would not bang") announced that he was renouncing his PUA ways and devoting himself to Jesus. He explained to the forum he manages that he would no longer be allowing anyone to discuss premarital "fornication."

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'Baby Geniuses' star Jon Voight took to Twitter early this morning to proclaim his undying love for Donald Trump, probably because there is no one left in his life who will listen to him talk about this, or anything else, in person. In this video rant, Voight encouraged members of the Republican Party, whom he apparently thinks are the only real citizens of the United States, to stand by Donald Trump and "acknowledge the truth" that he is the best President since Abraham Lincoln.


Part ONE:

People of the Republican Party, I know you will agree with me when I say our president has our utmost respect and our love. This job is not easy. For he's battling the left and their absurd words of destruction. I've said this once and I'll say this again. That our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers, and there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln. I'm here today to acknowledge the truth, and I'm here today to tell you my fellow Americans that our country…

Oh no, not our absurd words of destruction!

Part DEUX:

is stronger, safer, and with more jobs because our President has made his every move correct. Don't be fooled by the political left, because we are the people of this nation that is witnessing triumph. So let us stand with our president. Let us stand up for this truth, that President Trump is the greatest president since President Lincoln.

Does Jon Voight not know there have been... other presidents? Can he name them? Because really, it does not sound like it. Does he also not know that a very big chunk of the Republican Party actually does not care very much for Abraham Lincoln? Namely those defenders of Confederate statues that Trump called "very fine people?" Also, did he intentionally diss their beloved Ronald Reagan?

Who can know? Who can even tell what he is trying to say or why he is trying to say it. He doesn't appear to have tweeted much since 2016, so I'm guessing whoever's job it was to keep him from tanking his career quit. Either that... or after filming the seventh season of Ray Donovan, he found out it's going to be canceled or his character is getting killed off or something and he is now free to be a jackass? I don't know, I haven't watched the show, although my parents are very into it and mad that I haven't watched it. Literally all I know about it is that it has something to do with Boston, because they keep mentioning that to me like it's a selling point.

It seems useless at this point to note that the people who scream their faces off about how bad it is for Hollywood celebs to support liberal causes, and how they should keep their politics to themselves, etc. etc. make a way bigger deal than normal people do whenever a Big Time Hollywood Celebrity like Jon Voight or, uh, Scott Baio, supports their cause. Mostly because they're the only ones who have elected a reality TV star and the star of Bedtime for Bonzo (who by the way, also once practically ruined a perfectly good Bette Davis movie with his bad acting. Which is not to say that Dark Victory is not fantastic and probably the best thing to watch if you want to sob your face off, but he was very bad in it.) to run the country.

But we might as well do that anyway, because it actually never stops being funny.

[Jon Voight Twitter]

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