Hmm, The Fourteen Terrorist/Pat-Down Countries Might Have Issues With AMERICA NOW, HELLO?


Bombing starts in five, Algeria!Again, the background cannot be reiterated too many times: on Jeebus' birthday, a rich 23-year-old Nigerian dipshit loosely affiliated with The Terrorists attached a dime-bag of firecrackers to his boner, held snug by a dirty skid-marked tighty whity diaper apparatus. He tried to blow up his magical cockbomb on an airplane over Detroit and failed and it was over. The government responded by rerouting some chains of command, making sure memos got passed along, what else... oh yes, declaring proto-war on Yemen and Somalia forever, filling the administration's schedule exclusively for the foreseeable future with national security crybaby mop-up duty, forcing Americans (probably) to get all nakey in front of government employees before riding any airplane ever again, and preemptively determining that anyone from any of fourteen select countries (mostly allies) is a terrorist and must be put through a vice before being allowed to board a U.S.-bound airplane. It's that last little bit of "Al Qaeda gets absolutely everything it wants so easily" that is already fucking up our diplomatic shit like the dickens!

HEY PROBLEM HERE YOU GUYS -- MUZZIES UPSET -- MIGHT HAVE TO BOMB THEM (the dollar's running on fumes, we better fucking hurry!)

Leaders of the affected countries argued that the United States had essentially declared their entire population suspects and created a two-tier system for air travel.

“It is unfair to discriminate against over 150 million people because of the behavior of one person,” Dora Akunyili, Nigeria’s information minister, said Monday, referring Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab, the Nigerian accused of hiding explosives in his underwear on the Dec. 25 flight.

The Algerian ambassador to the United States, Abdallah Baali, said he would file a protest once he was given formal notice of the change.

“The United States has the right to protect the security of its citizens,” Mr. Baali said. “But this is discrimination against the citizens of Algeria, who do not pose any particular risk to the people of the United States.”

“We have to be careful not to play into the narrative that Al Qaeda has made up, where it is Islam versus the West,” he said. “We risk alienating the moderate populations that we need to be successful against Al Qaeda.”


(Oh and also, an addendum to the first paragraph: we're no longer sending dozens of innocent Gitmo tortured carcasses back to Yemen, because they would obviously become terrorists now.)

Obama Meets with Security Advisers [NYT]


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