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Hooray, Global Markets Collapse Again Because of ... Greece! (Again)

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Bank error in your favor! Oh wait, bank error *NOT* in your favor, sorry fucky.Let's check in with the Wonkette Business Desk for our morning economic roundup. U.S. pending home sales are at their highest point this year! U.S. manufacturing orders are at a two-year high! A terrorist plot against New York -- the financial capital of the world -- totally failed and the suspected/attempted car-bomber was caught by the cops! His alleged co-conspirators were caught in Pakistan! All kinds of bellwether companies are reporting solid profits, from MasterCard's 24% first-quarter profit to Sirius XM Radio's $41.6 million profit in Q1 -- people must be buying new cars again! So, of course, the markets are collapsing, worldwide, total panic, ARGH SELL JESUS CHRIST IT'S ALL HAPPENING AGAIN.


Why is the NASDAQ down 3%? What's knocking two-and-a-half percent of the S&P? Even Ron Paul's magick golden doubloons are falling. It's Greece and the EU, again. Shitty little Greece .... and, maybe, soon, Portugal and Spain and, uh, the UK. They are all broke. Can Germany afford to repair *all* these failed Euro States? And how quickly can what's his name, "Clegg," learn to Sprechen sie Deutsch? Oh right, he probably already speaks it, what with his Spaniard wife and all. [MarketWatch/Bloomberg]

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If there is anything that right-wing men seem to love, it is paying lots and lots of money to other dudes who will tell them how to live and/or function.

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Screenshot- Laura Ingraham Show

According to Rachel Campos Duffy, former reality TV personality and current Fox News personality, migrant baby jails are better than the "Projects". And she totally knows this for fact because she has a "black friend" who told her so. This totally mysterious black friend enlightened her on the horrors faced by black people in black places, which makes it perfectly okay for Trumpco to lock away those "privileged" brown babies. Also, stop being mean to her for spewing that hot garbage on the Laura Ingraham (who believes baby jails are like "Summer Camp") show, because it's not fair that you refuse to believe she has a black friend.

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