House Armed Services Committee Will Teach Stupid Hippie Generals The Error Of Their Ways

House Armed Services Committee Will Teach Stupid Hippie Generals The Error Of Their Ways

Libtards have a few grudging stock answers for things they like about the military: it kickstarted social integration in the country. It put Jean Claude Aristide back in power in Haiti, for a while. It scrubbed Alaskan rocks and seagulls of the Exxon-Valdez's bubbling crude. And it has led the way on alternative energy, both in its own R&D and as a ready-made market.All the generals (who are apparently a bunch of stupid hippies) agreed that Murka's dependence on foreign oil -- the government was spending $1 billion a day on it -- was a bit of a national security problem! Well, it is not a national security problem anymore, because the House Armed Services Committee -- oh, and the rest of the House -- has decided to make it illegal for the military to use any alternative fuels if they cost more than regular gas, coal, and oil! If a stupid hippie general likes something, all the House GOP has to do is kill it for no reason, and the problem (of a hippie somewhere smiling) is solved! Those guys, always looking out for the military's needs!

We remember a time when if "the generals" wanted solid-gold ballwashers, they got solid-gold ballwashers! But now, it seems, the Republican members of the House are a little more frugal. Oh, not for the important stuff, like building East Coast Star Wars installations that the Pentagon doesn't want -- no, that they will get. But for stupid stuff, like biofuels to power their infernal machines, and this:

The Conaway amendment included in the fiscal year 2013 National Defense Authorization Act (H.R. 4310) was meant to limit the Defense Department’s participation in an interagency agreement with the departments of Energy and Agriculture to spend $510 million to construct biorefineries capable of producing “drop-in” biofuels for the use by the Navy in its ships and jets, according to a summary.

Would such a thing perhaps have had important longterm social and economic ripple effects, with the military's enormous buying power enabling R&D that would benefit many types of important industries (and consumers)?

The effort has drawn the interest of commercial aviation giants such as Boeing Co. and United Continental Holdings, Agriculture Secretary Tom Vilsack said earlier this year.

Interest From Commercial Airlines

“They are very, very interested,” Vilsack said during remarks at forum held by the U.S. Conference of Mayors. “They too are interested in having 50 percent of their fuel supply, over time, being met by biofuels.”

Well, sucks to be you, commercial aviation giants, because you are not Big Oil, haha!

From AllGov:

Ironically [Oklahoma Sen. James] Inhofe, who objected strenuously to what would be a $12 million subsidy to the biofuels industry, voted in March to retain various subsidies to the oil industry, which are worth about $2 billion annually. As AllGov has reported previously, U.S. subsidies to the fossil fuel industry outweigh those to alternative energy by 6 to 1. Since 1989, Inhofe has received more than $1 million in campaign donations from the oil and gas industry.

Oh, and just one last thing. There's one alternative fuel the military will now be able to use.

The exclusions, however, do not eliminate all alternative fuels. Congressmen also recommended the exemption of the Defense Department from previous restrictions that prevent federal agencies from buying fuels that are more polluting than conventional fossil fuels.

And that is how you steward and have dominion over the earth: by punching hippie generals in the face.


Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


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