I'll Take Schemers Against the Great Satan For 600
Henry Hyde has introduced a bill to raise the price on Osama's head from $25 million to $50 mill. Because the problem with finding Osama is that his captors think we're lowballing them.
Hyde's bill would also "offer other inducements–'door prizes' such as motorcycles and cars, one aide says–for information on lower-level terrorists." This sounds like it might be trivializing a vital component of American statescraft, but it's a little-known fact that this is actually the way the Middle East intelligence system has always operated. The tipster who gave us Uday and Qusay received an Office Max "shopping spree" valued at $500. They guy who turned in Saddam? The proud owner of a brand-new Segway. The agent who came up with the evidence of Iraq's WMD capabilities? Year's supply of Turtle Wax.
Probably should have put a little more thought into that last one.