Iowa City, Chicago, Detroit: If You'd Known We Were Coming Would You Have Baked A Cake?
You know what is sad? Every time we go to Chicago, and you write to us a week later and say "hey, how come you never come to Chicago?" and then WE MURDER YOU, and your mother cries. Oh how she cries for you, she weeps and wails and snots her mother's tears. So, HI CHICAGO NO STUPID EXCUSES or you will BREAK YOUR MOTHER'S HEART (again).
At this very moment, we are wending our way Iowa City-ward. We dicked around in South Dakota for five days because we left Montana too early, and we certainly didn't want to spend five days in Iowa. I mean, just imagine! We will spend two days in Iowa though, courtesy of wonker Zanzibar Buckbuck McFate, so do come see us THIS SUNDAY, Jan. 31, from 4:30-6:30 p.m. at the Bluebird Diner in Iowa City. There, we shall purchase you a beer, or "a pop" if you already hit your lifetime beer quota.
In the meantime, while we wait for this Chicago bar to open so we can call them and see if they will let us bring a babby into their loud and iniquitous place of rock & roll (you gotta start 'em young), would you like to see some pictures? OKAY!
Oh yay, Reggie's Live will let us bring babies, so that is where we will see you, Chicago! Let us call it Wed., Feb. 3, from ... like 5 to 8 p.m.? Okay cool.
Detroit, you are Feb. 4., place still TBD.
THAT IS NEXT WEEK YOU GUYS DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU.
Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.