Ivanka Trump Speechifies At Global Women's Forum Because Women Haven't Suffered Enough
Ivanka Trump, whose greatest single accomplishment is standing upright, went on a tour of the Mideast where she stared poignantly at random objects. She also took time out of her never busy schedule to give a speech Sunday to women entrepreneurs and regional leaders in Dubai. She praised such countries as Saudi Arabia and United Arab Emirates for their "significant reforms" in advancing women's rights. For instance, Saudi Arabia recently allowed women to get their own passports and leave the country without a male relative's permission, so ... yay!
Trump gave the keynote address at the two-day Global Women's Forum. She was qualified to do this because she is the president's daughter and a woman — often both at the same time!
TRUMP: I am delighted to be attending the Global Women's Forum Dubai to advance women's economic empowerment around the world and highlight the progress of the Women's Global Development and Prosperity Initiative. This initiative has impacted over 12 million women in its first year, well on its way towards our goal of economically empowering 50 million women by 2025.
The Women's Global Development and Prosperity Initiative is Trump's pet project. It's supposed to do great things for women while her father's administration works to roll back abortion rights. Republican Sen. Lindsey Graham and Democratic Sen. Jeanne Shaheen have teamed up to have Trump's initiative written into law. The proposed legislation would establish an Office of Women's Empowerment at the State Department and ensure something survives the Trump administration beyond the flaming dumpster fire of our democracy.
During her keynote address, Trump crowed about the progress of women in the United States, very little of which has anything to do with any member of the Trump family.
TRUMP: Today, American women are leading in every aspect of society. Last year, there were more women than men in the United States workforce, with women securing over 70% of new jobs.
Trump likes to boast about how well women are doing in the "Trump economy." Last week, she said the unemployment rate for women was the lowest it's been in 75 years. As with any statement a Trump makes, this one becomes less true the more you fact check it. Women's unemployment was lower between 1952 and 1953, which is not 75 years ago, even if you let Donald Trump Jr. do the math. It's also not really the "Trump economy" that's responsible. Women's unemployment figures started to fall during Barack Obama's presidency, but the Trumps will always seek credit for not completely ruining everything Obama achieved.
This was a full weekend for America's random-ass diplomat. Saturday, Trump toured the Sheikh Zayed Grand Mosque at Abu Dhab and visited the city's branch of the Louvre Museum. She also also had a pleasant confab with the country's day-to-day ruler, Abu Dhabi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Zayed, who did his best to take her seriously. Ivanka Trump does all this for America and receives no compensation other than her inflated sense of self-importance. The banging resort, overlooking the Persian Gulf coastline, that hosted the Global Women's Forum probably didn't hurt either.
TRUMP: We know that when women are free to succeed, families thrive, communities flourish and nations are stronger.
Meanwhile, a disturbing number of women's rights activists are imprisoned on "vague charges." Trump will probably get around to addressing that after her facial.
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Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He's on the board of the Portland Playhouse theater and writes for the immersive theater Cafe Nordo in Seattle. Tickets are on sale now for his latest Nordo collaboration, "Curiouser and Curiouser," an adaptation of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking Glass." It promises to feel like an actual evening with SER (for good or for ill).