Jesus Wept.

Unclear whether kid said 'Jehova' or ... Ow! Stop that!

A daycare teacher in Forrest City, Arkansas, had a really smart idea to teach a four-year-old boy that you shouldn't throw rocks: Have other kids throw rocks at the little boy! In the April incident, a teacher at "Teach N Tend Daycare" (motto: "More the Latter, Honestly") had apparently just had it with the kids throwing rocks on the playground, and got innovative. Unfortunately for the daycare and the teacher, another teacher took video on her phone, and went to the police:

According to the woman, she and other workers were outside with kids when she noticed another teacher tell a child to sit down. The four-year-old allegedly picked up some rocks and threw them on the ground.

The complainant told police the other teacher then told students to throw rocks at the boy to teach him a lesson. The kids listened and the troubling video shows at least a half-dozen kids pelting the child with rocks.

The teacher who took the video was reportedly so disturbed by what she saw that she immediately resigned and took the video to the police.

The teacher has not yet been identified, and while police are investigating the incident, no arrests have been made. A police officer with way better hearing than we have wrote in a report,

"I observed approximately 6 toddlers throwing rocks at a white male toddler. The toddler is kneed down covering his face crying. A background voice says, 'He'll learn to stop, ok that's enough.'"

The teacher in question spoke with police. She told investigators the kids threw rocks all the time, and she didn't recall letting someone throw rocks at another child.

Finally somebody learned something from Steve Martin's old "You Can Be a Millionaire and Never Pay Taxes" routine: "I forgot it was wrong to encourage preschoolers to stone a four-year-old."

Incredibly, in the video report from Memphis TV station WHBQ, the owner of the daycare would say only that the police report was initiated by a "disgruntled former employee." When asked about the video recording, she said that any further comment would have to come from her attorney, which makes all kinds of sense.

The former teacher decided not to do an on-camera interview (small towns, you know), but said she'd witnessed other similar discipline at the daycare as well. Police said the Department of Child Services was investigating, and the daycare owner said she was cooperating with Child Services to "clear up" the matter.

One source familiar with the situation, Old Man Warner, advised Yr Wonkette that with the harvests on the way, this sort of thing is actually pretty common in the area, even though some young fools think they're so smart they should throw out a tradition that's been around since before even he was born:

"Pack of crazy fools," he said. "Listening to the young folks, nothing's good enough for them. Next thing you know, they'll be wanting to go back to living in caves, nobody work any more, live that way for a while. Used to be a saying about 'Lottery in June, corn be heavy soon.' First thing you know, we'd all be eating stewed chickweed and acorns. There's always been a lottery," he added petulantly.

It's unclear whether the child is still attending "Teach and Tend," or whether his parents have been informed of the incident, although another former teacher at the daycare, Tessie Hutchinson, told Yr Wonkette, as a circle of townspeople closed around her, "It isn't fair, it isn't right."

Mrs. Hutchinson screamed, and then they were upon her.

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Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.


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