Their words, NOT OURS.

Oh hi there, we are "killing time" between "important events." Later on, we are going to a Swanky As Fuk party for the Human Rights Campaign, and also another thing, but right now we are sitting at Woody's, the oldest gay bar in the whole United States Of Philadelphia, imbibing an adult beverage, and writin' atcha!

So, that guy up there, he is a Jew for Jesus, and we saw him on Market Street this afternoon, handing out ballots, for voting! Upon further examination of this "ballot," we have decided that the Jews for Jesus protesters in Philadelphia are totally sassy. Consider:

We think they are saying that you can be like REALLY DUMB and still get to vote. And you know what? THAT'S THE FUCKING POINT OF AMERICA, YOU STUPID FOOLS. Everybody gets to vote, even the dumb-dumbs. And there are A Idiots on both sides, so don't even start with yr Wonket right now, because we don't wanna hear it.

Anyway, as we are "killing time," and you have an insatiable desire for sexxx pictures, here are some. For instance, we stopped by a party thrown by The Atlantic, which is a very nice blogotubes website! It featured food and booze and also party favors, which is how we prefer our parties to be.

Speaking of party favors, here is us holding a party favor from last night's Nancy Pelosi party, at the party thrown by The Atlantic. Pelosi's party also had snap bracelets and temporary tattoos, because that is what Nancy Pelosi likes to play with in her spare time, ALLEGEDLY. Anyway, these are sunglasses:

Are you familiar with the Reading Terminal Market in Philly? It is where you can get EVERY FOOD YOU EVER WANTED, and it is wonderful. We are planning to move into the place tomorrow, permanently. Here are some pictures from there:

Inside there, amongst the many foods, there was a nice man selling beautiful pictures of your president Barry Bamzalot McGillicuddy:

And finally, here are some pictures taken by our secret Wonk operative "Chris," who works in the area and keeps sending us great pictures and stuff. KEEP 'EM COMIN, CHRIS!

OK, we are going to watch Obama and Biden tell everybody what a fuckin' big deal it is that Hillary is our new president, or whatever these speeches are about tonight. OH AND SEXXXY PARTIES. We are going to finally connect (probably) with Pennsylvania state Rep. Brian Sims, who is dreamy, but don't tell him we said that SHHHHH IT IS A SECRET:


Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the managing editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.


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