John McCain Wants You To Get Used To The Idea That He's The Nominee

McCain is back! Or, "Mac is back." He speaks now to tell you he will never forget how you all pretty much abandoned him last year, and only grudgingly came back to support him when the other candidates all flamed out so terribly. Also, why does McCain always thank "my children who could not be here"? How many children does he have?

His cougar wife Cindy is smiling, thinking about the dessert pills. And finally, McCain says, "And finally, thank you, Arizona."

Now he's talking about Arizona as if he ever actually lived there. Yes, he is the real Ed Abbey of Arizona, a true hero of the desert, etc.


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