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Kay Bailey Hutchison Officially Intends To Kick Rick Perry's Ass

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To the surprise of no one, Senator Kay Bailey Hutchisonofficially declared that she would be running for governor of Texas against Rick Perry, who could potentially serve FOURTEEN FRIGGING YEARS as head of that state. The race got off to a colorful unofficial start in late July when Internet sleuths discovered secret gay code words, such as "Rick Perry gay," on the senator's campaign site.


Minor quibble here: why is it that female politicians' campaign branding so often focuses on their first name? Hillary Clinton's massive "HILLARY" signs, Sarah Palin's SarahPAC, and now Kay For Governor ... Are women's last names just too terrifying for Average Voters?

Anyway, Hutchison will lose, due to all the nutbags voting in the GOP primary, and then Rick Perry will commence years 10-14 of his thousand-year rule.

Hutchison kicks off governor’s race, slams Perry [The Hill]

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Donald Trump held one of his televised cabinet meetings today in which he railed about the terrible Democrats who forced the current border crisis (at a time when illegal border crossings are actually lower than usual). In what's sure to be his favorite phrase on Twitter for the next few days, Trump blamed "extremist open-border Democrats" for all the problems he brought on himself with his family separation policy, and explained that Democrats were simultaneously hurting illegal immigrants AND the rest of America by forcing Normal America to accept Central Americans who fled to the US. It made loads of sense! And then things got ... less so.

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DHS Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen's week is going so great, she's earned herself one of Wonkette's prize-winning GO FUCK YOURSELFS! (Prize awarded to Wonkette by Wonkette.)

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