From Kerry front man Joe Lockhart's appearance on the Today Show this morning, responding to the White House spokesman Dan Bartlett's assertion that there are still "serious questions" to be answered about the origin of the forged TANG documents:
What is interesting about Mr. Bartlett, he stood up at the White House yesterday and say there are serious questions that have to be answered. I offered five different times to answer any question he had. He doesn't really have questions. He's playing politics. If he had any guts, come on and put the questions to me and we would clear this all up. But he doesn't have any guts.Joe then holstered his six-gun, eyed the drawn windows of the frightened town citizenry and bellowed, "If he wants to fight, that cur Bartlett knows where to find me!" With that, he stepped through the swinging doors of Stetson's, ready for the bourbon and the barmaid who waited for him there. . .
(Seriously: We are so turned on right now.)