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Kerry-Lieberman Fever Can't Help Global Warming Bill

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  • America's legendary "dream team" of John Kerry and Joe Lieberman reunited to unveil their exciting new Senate bill that's unlikely to change carbon emissions in America -- especially because it's unlikely to pass the Senate. Why? Because Lindsey Graham was only going to show the special bill to his Republican boyfriends because of all the "Drill Baby Drill" stuff he put in there for the Oil Industry, but then the Oil Industry is currently having a Gulf Spill Disaster so everybody hates offshore oil drilling again. So when will the USA finally cut its greenhouse-gas output? When the Chinese buy America from the bankruptcy court and *make* us do it, that's when. [NYT/Seattle Times]
  • Posh-ponce Tory David Cameron will have his first little meeting as prime minister, and reality-show runner-up "Liberal Democrat" Nick Clegg gets to go, too! What will they discuss? Oh, just how the UK is totally broke and it doesn't matter what politics anybody follows, as the entire job of this short-timer government will be to mercilessly slash costs everywhere and then *still* be nowhere near to crawling out of the Pit of European Debt Despair. [BBC News/Daily Markets]
  • Do you have a food allergy? No, you almost certainly do not have a food allergy. If so, one of your many enemies would've already killed you by sneaking a little of this allergen into your morning box of gluten-free soy donuts. [NYT/ABC News]
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