KerrySex Update: Lies, All Lies!

Associated Press reports:


    Breaking her silence four days after the allegations surfaced on the Internet, [No handbag line, no name. We don't want CJR to get mad at us.] issued a statement to The Associated Press, saying, "I have never had a relationship with Senator Kerry, and the rumors in the press are completely false."

Ew. Don't you feel dirty? Used?

Wouldn't you like to do it again?

UPDATE: Just noticed another quote:

    Because these stories were false, I assumed the media would ignore them.

We worked on a jokey response to this for a long time, but were ultimately defeated by the possibilities. Let's just say that our respect for journalism school programs has never been higher.

Woman Denies Rumors of Kerry Affair [AP/Yahoo]

GEORGE W. BUSH SMEARED IN ADULTERY SCANDAL [National Enquirer]

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