Laura Bush's Christmas-Cancer Cover-Up!
The first lady has the secret cancer! But this latest White House cover-up was exposed by eagle-eyed journalists who are always trying to look up her skirt.
Correspondents noticed a bandage on Laura Bush's knee (Which one? -- Ed. We don't really know/care!) and soon Tony Snow was forced to admit the nation's highest unelected official truly had Cancer of the Knee.
Snow then angrily attacked the White House press corps for noticing and asking about the bandage. Anyway, it was a "nickel-sized" skin cancer deal, and it was secretly removed last month.