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LEVEL 5 FREAKOUT! WIDESPREAD HUMAN INFECTION

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Do you know what's worse than a LEVEL FOUR flu pandemic freakout? A LEVEL FIVE flu pandemic freakout -- it is like four, but plus another, to equal five. Things can only get one more number worse than what will soon be announced, the Level 5 -- and that, as you probably already suspect, is a Level SIX (6) pandemic freakout. Stocks ended sharply higher. [EuroNews]

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