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Levi Johnston Is Now a Puppet For the Palins, Important News Blog MercedeJohnston.com Reports

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Hours ago,it was revealed that Levi Johnston, who is BACK ON with Trig or Tapper or whichever Palin he made a baby with, now says that some things he said in the past about the Palins are not true. His sister Mercede saw this and took to her blog with the news that LEVI IS NO LONGER TALKING TO HER OR HER MOTHER and SHE WENT FOUR-WHEELING THIS WEEKEND and SHE OWNS AN IPHONE and LEVI IS NOW A "PUPPET" FOR THE PALINS. Those things Levi said in the past seemed like the truth to Mercede when he told them to her, so they must have been true and now his brain has been drilled-baby-drilled with Palin brainwashing.


The four-wheeling thing is a very good framing device for this revelation, by the way:

I went four wheeling, roasted marshmallows, hiked, shared some laughter, and most importantly cleared my head and got away from all the drama that seems to overwhelm my life lately.

After about four hours of fun out on a four-wheeler I finally stopped someplace where there was a clear signal and checked my I-phone. I found that I had received a number of messages, but there was one which caught my attention, immediately made my heart beat faster, and brought a tear to my eye.

The message was from my mother saying that Levi, who has not spoken to us since he rekindled his relationship with Bristol (although we had attempted repeatedly to call or text him), left a message saying that if I did not take my blog down by Wednesday that I would never get to see him, or Tripp, again.

I could not believe it! I thought to myself if he was really willing to make such a threat that he would at least have the decency to call me and talk about it first. I mentioned on my blog repeatedly that my intention was not to hurt or attack the Palins, but to speak out and tell the public my side of the story. As well as how badly my life, and the lives of our family members, had been impacted by our association with the Palins.

It had my mind spinning. How could my brother threaten me like this?

Oh no! Levi has forgotten who his real family is! He will never return to his ancestral meth den! How can you do this, Levi? America and American Letters need Mercede's blog. Don't make her choose! (By the way, there is a PayPal box on her blog. Donate if you love grassroots white trash journalism!)

I wish Levi could be the man I know he is and have a mind of his own and finally stand his ground, but I guess he is blinded by love. I just wish he would take a step back and look at the bigger picture.

If everyone claps their hands and believes in Levi, the evil Palin spell with be broken. He will no longer be a puppet and will once again be a real centerfold boy. [MercedeJohnston.com via Andrew Sullivan]

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Donald Trump's presidency has made white nationalism fashionable again. It doesn't help matters that social networking giant Facebook has offered white nationalists a global platform for their hate. Back in May, Motherboard obtained internal documents that revealed how Facebook planned to handle white supremacist content on its site after Charlottesville. It was incredibly stupid.

See, Facebook wouldn't let you post praise of white supremacy as an ideology or identify yourself as a "proud" white supremacist. It would allow you to post praise of white nationalism as an ideology or identify yourself as a "proud" white nationalist. All those tech bros and all those hoodies in the same place and they still couldn't muster the collective brain power to understand that white supremacy and white nationalism are synonymous, by which I mean the exact same thing but with a slightly different arrangement of letters.

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Is Brett Kavanaugh's Evil Twin The Real Attempted Rapist? Maaaaaybe!

Another Pulitzer for Kathleen Parker pls!

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Over this past week, we have heard some fascinating excuses for Brett Kavanaugh having allegedly attempted to rape Dr. Christine Blasey Ford when he was in high school. Hey, he didn't rape us, said some ladies who knew him. It could have just been horseplay, said his spokesperson Carrie Severino! He wasn't even there, said Orrin Hatch! It totally doesn't matter anyway because he has done enough good in his lifetime that he should get to sexually assault like, one lady, said Dennis Prager! Maybe it was a false memory and she hallucinated the whole thing, said the Dilbert guy!

So many possible options. But something was missing. We didn't know it, but we felt it in our bones. And then, today, Pulitzer Prize-winning writer Kathleen Parker dropped it in the Washington Post. What if it wasn't Brett Kavanaugh, she tells us all, very seriously, but rather his evil twin. Or someone who just looked a whole lot like him. Perhaps even this "Bart O'Kavanaugh" we have been hearing so much about.

Let's hear her out!

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