Liveblogging VPILF Sarah Palin Greeting America!

News

August 29, 2008 12:32 PM

Yikes, the entire world is trying to read about Sarah Palin on Wonkette right now! So crazy. Anyway, our Alaskan GILF is now on stage and we're liveblogging it. She's a pretty girl, so we guess she's qualified to be president! But good lord we did not realize she had such a squeaky voice.

12:19 PM -- McCain is in a ... high-school auditorium? Cameras won't show anything beyond the floor.

12:19 PM -- McCain looks like he got a skin peel and a suntan, or he's slathered in orange makeup.

12:20 PM -- Now he's getting angry at the small crowd for singing him "Happy Birthday."

12:21 PM -- "Read My Book!"

12:21 PM -- So many empty seats! All the bleachers are empty.

12:21 PM -- Ha ha, he wants to "shake up Washington." Maybe he could remodel his houses there!

12:22 PM -- Now he's promising all his rejected GOP guy buddies various pretend positions in his pretend administration.

12:22 PM -- Soon we'll see how high Sarah Palin stands over lil' John McCain.

12:24 PM -- Tough to see if he's on a podium. Anyway, get it over with, Walnuts! Bring her out. Everybody watching already knows Palin's on the ticket.

12:25 PM -- "She's a standout high-school point guard." Ha ha, he picked a running mate based on high-school basketball skills. Will Sarah and Barack have a shooting debate?

12:25 PM -- "A mother of five." CHEERS! Hell yeah this woman can have a lot of kids!

12:31 PM -- Palin about her husband: "And he's a world-class snowmobile racer!" Jesus, she's at a junior high pep rally.

12:39 PM -- She seems like a super lady, and we have always loved her, but dear god Joe Biden is going to eat her for breakfast.

12:40 PM -- Ha ha, she can't pronounce "heroism."

12:44 PM -- Oh good god, listen to this pandering for Clinton lady voters.

12:45 PM -- Well, there we go. Her job is to tell Hillary voters they need to vote for McCain. Might be a bit too late for all that, after last night. And then there's the whole thing about Hillary being a socialist liberal.

12:47 PM -- Hooray for our GILF! She finally made the sorta big leagues!

Ken Layne

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Protesters Declare Donald Trump The REAL National Emergy

Happy Presidents Day!

Culture

Yeah, that's definitely a repurposed animatronic Hillary (YouTube)

A whole bunch of protests were held today against the fake "president's" fake "emergency" declaration, with people turning out in cold crappy weather to call attention to the general nastiness of the guy who claims he absolutely had to do that declaration that wasn't necessary. Organizers with MoveOn.org said over 250 rallies were planned nationwide. So far, the national State Of Emergency doesn't appear to have caused any of the rallies to be cancelled, despite the very real possibility that terrified Honduran refugees fleeing violence in Central America might suddenly show up and ask for asylum.

Are there still actions taking place in your area? Check at MoveOn!

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We've Asked This Before, But WHAT F*CKING SECRET IS PAUL MANAFORT WILLING TO DIE IN PRISON TO KEEP FOR TRUMP AND RUSSIA?

Whatever Paul Manafort's hiding about Trump and Russia, he's willing to give up the rest of his life to keep it hidden.

Russia

WHAT. IS. PAUL. MANAFORT. HIDING?

Before Manafort pleaded guilty and signed up as a cooperating witness who didn't actually cooperate, we wrote this:

We have always kind of figured that Paul Manafort is the one who knows the whole Trump-Russia conspiracy story. He was the first big fish indicted, and they hit him for A LOT. Also note that just about all the other prosecutions that have come from the Mueller investigation so far have been farmed out by Mueller to different jurisdictions. Manafort, on the other hand, Mueller has kept squarely in his office. There has to be a reason for that.

Perhaps it's because, as this Josh Marshall podcast suggests, Paul Manafort, a foreign agent who worked for Oleg Deripaska, AKA Putin's favorite oligarch, and who got sideways financially with Deripaska, was literally sent into the Trump campaign by the Kremlin to do its dirty work. Perhaps the Steele Dossier is right when it suggests that the entire Trump-Russia election-stealing conspiracy was run by Manafort on the Trump side, and that others like (perhaps!) Michael Cohen only had to take over when Manafort's shit started to stink and the news media started reporting on his weird-ass Russian connections in the summer of 2016.

If it's possible, we are beginning to suspect it may be even worse than that.

On Friday, special counsel Robert Mueller issued his sentencing recommendations for Manafort, after DC district court Judge Amy Berman Jackson ruled conclusively that the shady motherfucker very intentionally lied and blew up his cooperating agreement. Because Manafort defaulted, Mueller is no longer bound to recommend that Manafort's sentence be reduced, and is free to throw the book right at Manafort's face. HARD.

And that is what Mueller did! To be clear, the sentencing memo is harsh.

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