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Liz Glover Finds Happiest Tea Partiers Ever (Who Are There 'On a Whim')

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Here's a welcome change from the usual mouth-breathing teabaggers farting up the Capitol: Happy youth, who just wandered over to the Hill to see what's up, for the laffs! And our Liz Glover captured their merriment (and their souls) with her Soulcatcher Machine.

The young lady even knows that Liz Carpenter was an aide to Lyndon Johnson. Liz Carpenter just died, and your Wonkette didn't even mention it. She was a funny writer in Texas.

Speaking of the LBJ administration, Stewart Udall died, too, and we didn't mention that -- and that's just sad, because Stewart Udall did more for this nation's Environment than probably any federal official since Teddy Roosevelt. "Highlights from his Cabinet career are The Wilderness Bill; The Wild and Scenic Rivers Act; the expansion of the National Park System to include four new national parks, six new national monuments, eight seashores and lakeshores, nine recreation areas, twenty historic sites, and fifty-six wildlife refuges; and the creation of The Land and Water Conservation Fund." Jesus, all the stuff we missed because of the Teabagger Riots of March 2010.

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Donald Trump's presidency has made white nationalism fashionable again. It doesn't help matters that social networking giant Facebook has offered white nationalists a global platform for their hate. Back in May, Motherboard obtained internal documents that revealed how Facebook planned to handle white supremacist content on its site after Charlottesville. It was incredibly stupid.

See, Facebook wouldn't let you post praise of white supremacy as an ideology or identify yourself as a "proud" white supremacist. It would allow you to post praise of white nationalism as an ideology or identify yourself as a "proud" white nationalist. All those tech bros and all those hoodies in the same place and they still couldn't muster the collective brain power to understand that white supremacy and white nationalism are synonymous, by which I mean the exact same thing but with a slightly different arrangement of letters.

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Is Brett Kavanaugh's Evil Twin The Real Attempted Rapist? Maaaaaybe!

Another Pulitzer for Kathleen Parker pls!

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Over this past week, we have heard some fascinating excuses for Brett Kavanaugh having allegedly attempted to rape Dr. Christine Blasey Ford when he was in high school. Hey, he didn't rape us, said some ladies who knew him. It could have just been horseplay, said his spokesperson Carrie Severino! He wasn't even there, said Orrin Hatch! It totally doesn't matter anyway because he has done enough good in his lifetime that he should get to sexually assault like, one lady, said Dennis Prager! Maybe it was a false memory and she hallucinated the whole thing, said the Dilbert guy!

So many possible options. But something was missing. We didn't know it, but we felt it in our bones. And then, today, Pulitzer Prize-winning writer Kathleen Parker dropped it in the Washington Post. What if it wasn't Brett Kavanaugh, she tells us all, very seriously, but rather his evil twin. Or someone who just looked a whole lot like him. Perhaps even this "Bart O'Kavanaugh" we have been hearing so much about.

Let's hear her out!

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