Lonely Newspaper Seeks Readers

Where do you go to get rid of junk that no one wants, even when it's free? Why, Craigslist, of course. Alas, in the FREE section, there's way too much competition from soiled mattresses and toxic waste. So if you're smart, write up a faux Missed Connections ad: "As an Examiner fan, I like a little bit of depth in my relationships, and you seem to be perfectly fine with just skimming the surface of things...Look, we Examiner readers like to peak a bit beneath the surface, but never so deep as to offend your own privacy and waste your time...Originality is the spice of life, baby, and the Examiner has got original reporting and editorials. Now that's fresh. You like being fresh, right? Of course you do, baby."

The Washington Examiner: A Love Story [Craigslist DC]


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