Looks Like Mike Huckabee And The Duggars Are Still Totally Gay For Each Other
Is Mike Huckabee sharing his award-winning Hucka-diddles with the Duggar family again? (He never stopped.) Are Jim Bob, Michelle and the child-fruits of their incessant barebacking, including their handsy firstborn, no longer completely toxic to a presidential run? Or is Mike Huckabee just A Idiot? The answer is probably more of the latter, MUCH LESS of the former.
It seems Huckabee is dipping his finger in the Duggar stew again to see if maybe his followers have decided to forgive the former TLC family for its sins against decency and young children. And how? The Inquisitr reports that Huckabee is the cofounder of a side business, called Mike Huckabee's Learn Our History, maybe as a source of income for when this "running for president" thing hilariously fails. The company makes "free DVDs" so kids can learn how to Constitution good, the way Jesus did:
With the next presidential election coming up in 2016, wouldn't you like your kids to understand how we choose our president? The new DVD, Election Day: Choosing Our President, from Learn Our History is a great way to teach your kids all about the presidential election process!
In this exciting FREE DVD, your kids will join a group of time traveling history students who go back in time to find out how the United States election process came to be. Along the way, they'll learn all about primaries and caucuses (and how they’re different), debates, nominating conventions, what the Electoral College is and how it works, and so much more! Plus, they’ll enjoy a special animated appearance by Learn Our History's Co-Founder, Governor Mike Huckabee!
An animated appearance?!?! Wait, animated how? Like, he's a cartoon? Or like he just did some snorted some sweet meth off Phyllis Schlafly's downstairs hole, which made him particularly animated when he was filming the DVD? We would do journalism and watch the video to find out, but we don't want to SPOILER ALERT Huckabee's exciting movie or anything.
Unfortunately (and SADFACE!) you only get the first DVD for free. The rest of them, which the FAQ promises are great for homeschoolers and never "Blame America First," are sent to you automatically for the low, low price of $11.95 + $3.95 shipping and handling, once a month, UNTIL THE END OF THE WORLD. Remember Columbia House and BMG? This is like that, except for the products bear the faint scent of Huckabee's underboob after he cuts the grass.
And how do Ma and Pa Duggar have their sex thighs wrapped around Mike Huckabee's Constitution Jesus porn videos, for kids? 'Splain us, Inquisitr!
On Thursday, they promoted the series on their Facebook page, using a unique URL that lets the site know a purchaser was referred by the Duggars — a referral ID commonly used in order to give a sales partner a cut of the revenue and determine how much traffic is coming to a site through one referrer.
There we go! And here's that URL. You can click it, we doubt you can catch any of Josh Duggar's weenus gremlins through the internet. And here's that Duggar post:
Maybe the Duggars really ARE broke and they need their old friend Mike Huckabee, who boldly stepped up to defend Ma and Pa's handling of their son's attempt to put on a one-man show called "19 Kids And Mounting," to help them earn moneys. They used to campaign for him, after all! Of course, when the shit hit the fan and all the scandals started coming out, Huck quietly wiped his campaign website down with a cum-sock, removing any references to the Duggars, but maybe that's all blown over now and America forgot.
So maybe they'll all get to go campaign together again, for Huck to be president! Maybe when it's time to go to the Iowa caucuses, they can take the Hucka-bus through Illinois and pick Josh up at the Jesus Touched Me, But Not In A Gay Way sex rehab for family values celebrities who do the bad sex. And then, what fun, the whole band will be back together again!
And then Mike Huckabee will lose another primary, The End.