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Maria Bartiromo: Obama Was Too Mean To Citigroup CEO Vikram Pandit And So He Quit

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When CEO Citigroup Vikram Pandit quit yesterday after five years of service, the talking heads on the TeeVee were left to wonder what had happened. It's quite a "headscratcher," said the Yahoo finance team! Also, he kind of sucked!. Did he quit because they figured out he sucked, perhaps? (And to be fair, it appears that he did kind of suck.) Or maybe, as Economic Times suggests, it's because he was asked to "get more involved?" No, of course not, it is because of none of those things. He quit, says Maria Bartiromo, because the Obama administration was mean to him and he just couldn't take it anymore.

Maria Bartiromo starts out by pointing out the fact that the board has hired a new CEO that will basically be investing in "emerging markets" (read: India and China because the U.S. is possibly going to be in the shitter for another couple decades at least) before suggesting that maybe he just wasn't paid enough (which, by the way, did not seem to be only a dollar as he claims, given that he was paid $165,000,000 for his hedge fund when he took the job as CEO (a hedge fund they promptly shut down) in addition to his regular pay and stock options and whatnot). But isn't the REAL issue here his hurt feelings? Her analysis is that it's about compensation, and also, the fact that he got "bashed and bashed and bashed" by the President and by the hippie commie liberal scum in Occupy Wall Street, and said to himself that it wasn't worth the "dollar" he was being compensated in exchange for his work. ONCE AGAIN, however, we will point out that the company has lost 90% of its value since he took over in 2007 so even if he DID get a dollar in addition to all of his other executive compensation, maybe it was just desserts. Or maybe not, because of his hurt feelings. Also, we can't wait to see what Erin Burnett has to say about this.

[HuffPo]

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Robbin Young. Fair use so we can all see the boob picture she sent to her 12 true loves.

Robbin Young starred in the Roger Moore masterpiece For Your Eyes Only as the seventh female lead, "Girl in Flower Shop." She also starred in a bunch of Playboys, and the DM's of a humble Romanian hacker who stole her heart. But he was not a humble Romanian hacker, he was 12 Russian military intelligence officers in a trench coat. And now Young has shared those DMs and pictures of her buzzies with the Sun, because that's the one that's fookin' classy.

See how she loved! See how Guccifer ghosted her ass! See how she loves him (them) still! See how she was all up in Seth Rich and shit! (We think Young's judgment might not be awesome.) Also she wrote this "erotic poem," and we're going to need you to read it.

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And now it is time for your weekly reminder that in the Trump era, FUCKING APESHIT OUTRAGE WORKS.

On Monday, Donald Trump, the transactional president who for some godforsaken reason sees Vladimir Putin has his one true father, discussed making an Art Of The Deal with Russia that involved letting Robert Mueller interrogate the Russian spies who hacked America in 2016 (with Russian supervision, of course, in Russia) in exchange for sending Putin whichever American citizens hurt Putin's poor fragile butthurt pansy-ass feelings the past several years. One of Putin's targets is Michael McFaul, the former ambassador to Russia, whom Putin just hates. Hillary Clinton isn't on the official list yet, but give it a few weeks.

On Wednesday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders looked at reporters and told them Trump's people were considering the idea, but hadn't decided yet, because it's so hard for the Trump administration to decide how many treasons to do per week.

But hooray! The White House has decided that, after literally every American with a patriotic bone in his or her body said, "THE FUCK YOU SAY," they will not send Americans to Putin's gulag after all. The Washington Post reports:

The White House announced Trump's opposition Thursday as the Senate prepared to vote on a resolution telling the president not to honor Putin's request, which would have exposed former U.S. ambassador Michael McFaul, among others, to Russian questioning.

"It is a proposal that was made in sincerity by President Putin, but President Trump disagrees with it," White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders said in a statement.

Oh my fucking Lord, Shuckabee, did you really type that Putin's offer was "sincere," or did Donald grab the statement after you finished with it and add those words in illiterate Sharpie in the margins, along with "DOES NOT MEAN PUTIN IS NOT MY BEST FRIEND" and "NO COLLUSION"?

By the way, that resolution passed the Senate with flying colors:

WOMP WOMP, Trump! Sorry American freedom and democracy stepped all over your dick again! Guarantee it's gonna happen again! Go fuck yourself! Enjoy the 48 Big Macs you have for dinner tonight! Don't talk directly into the soccer ball Putin gave you, 'less you want it to talk back to you in Russian!

OK post over.

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[Washington Post]

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