Journalism

Pretty Much All You Need To Know About Trump's Sad Loser 'Tony Bobulinski' Hail Mary Pass

Wall Street Journal Hunter Biden disinfo blocked by heroes at ... the Wall Street Journal.

Donald Trump, a guy whose entire family lives off his name, is trying to gin up a scandal because Hunter Biden monetized his own father's name. That's it, that's the tweet.

Or really, that's the entire stupid, last minute, Hail Mary pass from Team Trump. Half a mile from the White House is a Trump-branded hotel where foreign governments, lobbyists, and corporate entities slip millions of dollars directly into the president's pocket every year. But Donald Trump wants to make hay out of Hunter Biden trying — and mostly failing — to cash in on his connections. And he's doing it with the aid of not one, not two, but three Rupert Murdoch-owned media outlets, because those are the only ones who'll touch this shit with a 10-foot pole.

And now we have to learn about some asshole named Tony Bobulinski!

This year SUUUUUUUUUUUUCKS.

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Journamalism

Who Wanna Watch MSNBC's Hallie Jackson Dick-Punch Hogan Gidley?

YOU DO! YOU DO!

Hey was there a debate last night? We didn't hear.

Anyway, y'all love it when women kick Trumpers in the nuts and make them eat it, especially when it's woman reporters on the fake news, so since it is Friday — maybe the next-to-last Friday before our long national nightmare begins to end! — here is a post about MSNBC's Hallie Jackson dickpunching Trumper Hogan Gidley.

Y'all remember Hogan Gidley, right? He is the White House spokes-nerd whose name can't possibly be real, and moreover nothing else about him can possibly be real. ALLEGEDLY, he is a different person from "Judd Deere," the gay one. ALLEGEDLY.

Point is, Gidley went on the TV to talk to MSNBC's Hallie Jackson on Thursday, and immediately he started blabbing his dumb lying face off about mail-in voter fraud. But wait! How could he possibly do that after FBI Director Chris Wray and Director of National Intelligence John Ratcliffe called a SUPER EXTRA IMPORTANT press conference, in part to explicitly say that rumors on the internets you hear about rampant mail-in voter fraud are hell-lies from Iran, which is spreading them by hitting "record" on videos of Donald Trump talking about rampant mail-in voter fraud?

How could he possibly do that? Because he is paid for lying.

Watch Hallie Jackson dickpunch Hogan Gidley:

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Elections

Deep State Hard At Work Protecting Free And Fair Elections. No, We Mean It!

Be cool, guys.

Can it be ... Nice Times?

IT CAN!

The Washington Post has a new story on all the ways our government is actually doing the work to stop electoral interference. And they're doing it in coordination with social media platforms and local governments. Deep State FTW!

For months American military cyber-operators, aided by intelligence from the National Security Agency (NSA), have been targeting Russian spies to disrupt their plans by repeatedly knocking them off the Internet, confusing their planners and depriving them of their hacking tools. The goal is to prevent them from attacking U.S. voting systems, according to security officials, speaking on the condition of anonymity because of the matter's sensitivity.

The effort spans multiple agencies in the executive branch. Most visibly, the State Department revoked visas for Rudy Giuliani's Ukrainian disinformation sources, Andrii Telizhenko and Andrii Derkach, while the Treasury Department put Derkach on the sanctions list, after which Google disabled 14 of his accounts and deleted his YouTube channel.

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Sex

Does Rudy Giuliani Also Pull His Pants Down All The Way To Pee?

These are the burning questions of our time.

Have you been following the twisting tale of Rudy Giuliani going back to his hotel room with the lady he thought was a young pretty reporter who wanted to see his Little Rudy, but just as it appeared things were about to go down, Borat ran into the room like "PUT DOWN YOUR CHRAM" and shouted that she was 15 and therefore too old for him?

HERE COME THE EXCUSES.

HE WAS JUST TUCKING IN HIS SHIRT, YOU GUYS.

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