- John McCain used top-secret old man alias ("Eldon Smith") to build bubbly Jacuzzi accoutrement at Cindy's desert chateau. [Daily Kos]
- Gloria Allred performs public erotic self-asphyxiation, for the love of Hillary! [Top of the Ticket]
- Congressmen can hang out with their lobbyist friends only if they are fed terrible greasy crab meat on sticks while doing it. [Swampland]
- While Mitt Romney was busy saving the Olympics from itself, Obama was doing absolutely nothing and couldn't even be bothered to work at a convenience store. [Jonathan Martin]
- McCain's top foreign policy adviser Randy Scheunemann lobbied to allow suspected terrorists to own guns, so they can kill ... each other? [TPM Muckraker]
- Known Muslim Communist Barack Obama would rather resurrect the Berlin Wall, in America, and live with fellow Marxists in a walled-off sex commune than be President.
[RedState]