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Meet the Baltimore Examiner's Psychopath Editor!

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If you live in a row house connected to the row house of chain-smoking Baltimore Examiner editor Frank Keegan and so much cigarette smoke is seeping into your house that your kids are choking on the fumes, it's probably not a good idea to pound on Keegan's door yelling about the problem as the paramedics treat your daughter, because Keegan will (allegedly) pull a shotgun on your entire family.


That's the lesson we learned from today's Baltimore Sun, which has the hilarious account of the feud between Keegan and the family who lives next door. Keegan reportedly greeted their knocking with a friendly "You fucking lunatics, get away from my door!" The cops showed up and hauled Keegan away after seizing his Remington 870 Wingmaster 12-gauge pump action shotgun -- they apparently didn't take his Nazi Germany P-38 9mm pistol that he keeps in the bedroom.

The 58-year-old angry editor is charged with "three counts of second-degree assault and two gun violations." He is in jail and will soon join the staff of Wonkette.

Examiner editor arrested on gun charges [Baltimore Sun]

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Cripes the News has been awful lately! And so Yr Editrix suggested we find some good, positive news. Especially after we pitched writing a Wonket about this Mother Jones story on how global warming may be killing the whales, even though Donald Trump knows their prince. (Reply: "Nope. FOR SURE NOT THAT.") And so, as a reminder that a gooder world is possible and apropos of nothing at all that definitely didn't set your Editrix off on Twitter, where she has been stewing and bitching most shrillfully about the 2016 election and the 2020 election and any terrible similarities thereof and thereupon and therefore and thereto, we present a collection of videos of Elizabeth Warren yelling at big banks and calling for them to be broken up and their criminal operators to go to jail. Puppies and kittens will only get you so far, after all.

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