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Michelle Obama and Carla Bruni Eat Lunch at the Cool Table

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Our FLOTUS has a new right-hand lady! Her name is Tina Tchen, and she is some sort ofrobot creature who has a giant clock trapped inside of her that prevents her from sleeping. She runs on energy obtained from the extracted body fat of obese children. She is also from Chicago, because that is the only city capable of producing shiny new staff members for the White House. But Michelle’s new chief of staff is hardly news. The real excitement comes today because our FLOTUS will have another Sexy Gossip Time with First Italian-turned-French Lady of Fashion and Song, Carla Bruni.


Michelle Obama and Carla Bruni will have lunch today, and everyone in the world is waiting on pins and needles to see what groundbreaking developments will come of their meeting, like maybe an unflattering top or the traditional debate over whose job as First Lady is more like living en enfer.

The world’s two most closely watched first ladies — Michelle Obama and Carla Bruni-Sarkozy — will meet at the White House for lunch on Monday, a senior administration official said.

Mrs. Sarkozy’s husband, Nicolas, is planning to visit with President Obama, and their wives, who have made their share of headlines together, will eat privately, according to the official, who insisted on remaining anonymous.

What is it with these ladies? No one can even go on the record to say they are having lunch?

Careful Michelle-Carla observers will remember that their first meeting, in Strasbourg, France, in 2009, turned into a fashion face-off of sorts — at least for reporters, who were eager to deconstruct the meaning of each outfit in an attempt to figure out which first lady had smacked down the other.

It’s not a lunch between women until someone has been “smacked down.” What could Michelle and Carla even have to talk about, anyway, besides who has better shoes? The pea-sized female brain can’t do much else, or it explodes and melts into lip gloss.

Then, last year, two French journalists wrote a book in which they claimed that Mrs. Obama had told Mrs. Sarkozy that life as first lady of the United States is “hell.” Spokesmen for both first ladies denied the account.

The senior official did not have details about the purpose of the lunch or whether it was purely social. Sometimes a lunch is just a lunch.

It remains a mystery why someone would think Michelle could say such a thing. They clearly don't know our FLOTUS too well, because she wakes up every morning thanking Jesus that she doesn't have to eat a sandwich or put on a bracelet without either object undergoing some sort of interpretation. That's the FLOTUS we know and love. [NYT]

Blair Burke (blairelinor@gmail.com) obsessively follows Michelle Obama's every move for "The FLOTUS Files," which appears every Monday here at your Wonkette.

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Fellow Wonkers, this last week of horror has been wearing on us all, because here we are in a world where the "president" of the United States has ordered that migrant children be taken away from their parents at the border, and is simultaneously proud of it (for his base) and cravenly blaming it on Democrats because even he knows it's morally reprehensible. But what the hell can we do about it beyond calling our senators and representatives and posting sadness on Twitter, the latter of which is of dubious utility to anyone, and mostly depressing?

Resist the urge to disappear into a bottle. The kids and the families need you.

Slate has compiled a great list of places to start, which we will liberally summarize for you right now:

The thing these folks need most is LAWYERS. If you're an immigration lawyer, you're probably already swamped. But on the off chance you have time and expertise to spare, the American Immigration Lawyers Association is building a list of volunteers.

Yr Dok Zoom has given money to the fine folks at RAICES, a San Antonio-based group that has two major projects. They're getting lawyers for migrant families (and for the kids when possible) and raising money to pay migrant parents' bond so they can be out of jail and with their families. If you're in Texas, then click here to volunteer!

Update: RAICES is also holding a "what you can do" webinar this Thursday:



Also for folks who are in Texas:

The Texas Civil Rights Project is seeking "volunteers who speak Spanish, Mam, Q'eqchi' or K'iche' and have paralegal or legal assistant experience."

There's also CARA -- an umbrella organization for the Catholic Legal Immigration Network, the American Immigration Council, the Refugee and Immigrant Center for Education and Legal Services, and the American Immigration Lawyers Association. Together, they provide legal services at immigration detention centers.

To help kids who are already in immigration detention, there's Kids in Need of Defense, which provides children with representation in immigration court and also lobbies for children's legal interests. Donate here.

If you're not quite sure where to give, ActBlue has bundled several immigrant rights groups into a single donation button -- see the list and donate here.

Remember, there's always the ACLU, which is fighting family separation with a federal class action lawsuit.

You want to march? Former top government ethics lawyer Walter Shaub, who gave up trying to tell the Trump administration what ethics even are, will be announcing the details of a national march (think DC and local affiliated marches) tonight on MSNBC's "All In with Chris Hayes." We'll make noise here, too.

Good people are coming together to put an end to this cruelty. EVERY Democrat in the Senate is now co-sponsoring Dianne Feinstein's bill to stop family separation.

And hell, we'll even give the last word to Jennifer Rubin, who seems to have reassessed some of her previous political views. She has a reminder for all of us:

Damn straight. Remember it every damn day between now and then.

It's your open thread. Don't boo -- organize. Time to RESIST.

Follow Doktor Zoom on Twitter

Don't take for granted that the institutions you love will always be there, like democracy, and Wonkette. Click to save at least one of them!

[Slate]

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There are perks to being the only Harvard professor willing to shill for the Bush League Mussolini. Everyone else has to haul ass to the Fox studio and sit for hair and makeup. Not Alan Dershowitz! He just parks his laptop in Pee Wee's playhouse and Skypes in that rant. Is he even wearing pants? We hope never to find out!

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