Mike Huckabee Was Really Shooting for Reporters
When Mike Huckabee went hunting in Iowa Wednesday to prove that he had a penis or something, he bagged him a pheasant or two, but he was really hoping to kill reporters. At least that's the account of one reporter there, who notes that, "At one point, Huckabee's party turned toward a cluster of reporters and cameramen and, when they kicked up a pheasant, fired shotgun blasts over the group's heads." Huck, you crazy wombat! The press has been so nice to you recently, by like, not bringing up your hatred of gay people and all that other crazy Jesusery at all.
The Chicago Tribune's Jim Tankersley notes that this close call came right after Huck made a joke about how Dick Cheney shot that old man in the face last year. Because if Teh Huckbeez has anything, it's an endless cache of hilarious jokes that mostly make his own party despise him. These jokes also divert attention from the, you know, serious danger this man puts on all of our lives:
...Huckabee's party was about 75 yards away from the press corps Wednesday when a pheasant jumped up and flew toward the reporters, drawing several shots. "That was too close," he reports a cameraman saying.
Perhaps Huckabee missed hunter's safety classes - Arkansas only requires them for hunters born after 1968 - but the etiquette on this point is clear.
"Never point a firearm at yourself or others," the International Hunter Education Association declares in its Basic Safety Rules. Later, it adds, "Never point your firearm at something you do not intend to shoot. Make sure you positively identify what you are shooting at and know what lies in front of and beyond it."
Well, if someone from HuffPo was in the crowd of reporters, it's a safe bet that he knew exactly what was in front of him, and he wanted to kill it.
Huckabee's muzzle control problem [The Swamp]