Missouri Wingnut Wants To Impeach Governor Over Gay Tax Returns: No Taxation Without Procreation
In the never-ending quest to protect the sanctity of marriage, and more importantly, the rule of law, Missouri state Rep. Nick Marshall is fixin' toimpeach Governor Jay Nixon for the high crime of signing an executive order that will let same-sex married people file joint state tax returns. Missouri doesn't allow gay marriage, of course, but since the Supreme Court threw out DOMA, Missouri couples married in other states will now be able to file a joint Federal 1040. Since Missouri law requires anyone filing a joint Federal return to file jointly on their state taxes, Nixon directed the Department of Revenue last week to allow the change, saying that
"accepting the jointly-filed state tax returns of all legally-married couples who file Federal returns is the only appropriate course of action, given Missouri statutes and the ruling by the U.S. Department of Treasury.”*
Not so fast with all this sodomy-based paperwork, says Rep. Marshall! For heaven's sake, if teh gheys can file a joint return, what's to stop joint filings from a man and a velociraptor, huh? Also, INPEACH!
Not only does Nixon's executive order conflict with the state's 2004 marriage amendment, says Marshall, but the Governor is even ignoring the text of the Missouri tax law, which doesn't say nothing about no homosexers, explains the Missouri Times:
RsMo. 141.031 states that: “A husband and wife who file a joint Federal income tax return shall file a combined return.” Marshall contends that because the statute specifies a husband and wife, Nixon was under no obligation to issue an executive order on the matter.
Last Friday, Marshall posted this stirring defense of Law And Order on his Facebook page:
I will seek Articles of Impeachment against the Governor. He has openly disregarded the laws and Constitution of the State of Missouri and allowed his administration to do so on multiple occasions. If we are to live under the Rule of Law, he cannot be allowed to remain in office.
See? It's not about the gheys, it's about preventing tyranny. Marshall also denied any political motivation at all, saying in a follow-up comment, "I don't give a rat's tail about party affiliation when it comes to the Rule of Law," and contending that Gov. Nixon violated Missouri law by cooperating with Federal agencies on other matters that he's certain Nixon shouldn't have, like allowing the ATF access to records about the state's concealed-weapon permits. Again, you got your tyranny right there.
In yesterday's Missouri Times piece, Marshall appeared to have slowed down his demands just a little bit, saying he would "listen to counsel" and drop the move if he's "persuaded that the position I currently hold isn’t the correct one":
“I’m not interested in doing this as some kind of political ploy. But if my position on this remains correct, then I consider it my duty to move forward with it.”
Yep, just a matter of principle and duty, because god knows a small change in the tax filing status of a fairly small number of residents is pretty much the living definition of high crimes and misdemeanors.
If nothing else, at least it will finally be a chance to see the "Nixon Impeached" headlines some of us dreamed of forty years ago.
* Tiny update: the Missouri Times added a typo to Nixon's press release, changing "Missouri statutes" to "Missouri statues." We know they're proud of their arch, but jeez... In any case, the governor can spell, the newspaper can't. Good catch, alert commenter "delaney_blom"!
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.