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Mitt Romney Hosted A Lovely Totalitarian Loyalty-Pledge Party Today

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That Mitt Romney was such a care-free goofball when he was trying to win the nomination, never asking anything of anybody. He would like to thank all of those friendly folks across the country who turned his lil' old aw-shucks candidacy into the powerhouse that it is today. Good times. But guess what? That primary phase is all over.From here on out, YOU WILL OBEY MITT ROMNEY OR DIE. HAVE YOU SIGNED THE PLEDGE, SLAVE?


The Romney campaign invited all sorts of RNC officials, delegates, local party leaders and so on to what they thought was a casual meet-and-greet today, where they could get to know and have their picture taken with the GOP's newest Dear Leader. How thoughtful of him, reaching out like that! Oh, but there was just one condition: total submission to his Lordship until the end of time:

Scottsdale, Arizona (CNN) - Members of the Republican National Committee gathering in Arizona were invited to meet with Mitt Romney in private Friday and have their pictures taken with the presumptive GOP nominee, but there was a price of admission: loyalty.

RNC members and state GOP chairmen were welcomed into the private reception only after signing a form pledging to support Romney as a delegate to the national convention in Tampa.

All 168 members of the committee have a vote at the convention as "superdelegates" – and one of Romney's supporters on the RNC estimated that over 100 members signed the form.

The Romney "delegate pledge form" asked members to sign their name and "pledge to vote for Mitt Romney at the 2012 Republican National Convention on all ballots until Mitt Romney has been nominated."

Signers were given the option of declaring their support publicly or privately by checking one of two boxes.

No sentence has ever captured the essence of daily life in the impending Mitt Romney Era better than, "Signers were given the option of declaring their support publicly or privately by checking one of two boxes."

But it's only a piece of paper. Just sign it. Why haven't you signed it yet? You really should sign it. You do want to hear your first-born's voice again, don't you?

Not everyone was allowed to join in the fun.

All three members of Iowa's conservative RNC delegation – party chairman A.J. Spiker and committee members Steve Scheffler and Kim Lehman – attempted to enter the reception but were rebuffed after refusing to sign the delegate pledge.

The dispute became heated in the hallway outside, with the Iowans demanding to know why they had to sign a form to get their picture taken with the former Massachusetts governor.

Several of Romney's deputies on the committee assured the trio that they could keep their support a secret by checking the appropriate box, but they refused to do so.

"They don't trust us," a frustrated Scheffler said after the argument. "I have said I will support the nominee when we have a nominee, no ifs, ands or buts."

The great thing about signing a pledge from the Mitt Romney campaign, though, is that you can just break it and it won't matter and everyone will laugh at Mitt Romney.

[CNN]

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Donald Trump held another great big slob picnic in Orlando, Florida, last night, where he "announced" the "start" of his 2020 campaign, which will be exactly like his 2016 campaign except for the minor detail that he's actually been in the White House since 2017, which is really a bummer, man. Still, it's no reason he can't run as an outsider who vows to protect everyday Americans who believe he's just like them. The rally was a mishmash of the same damn shit he's said a million times before, and the rubes loved almost every minute of it except for the boring parts when he talked about stuff he's supposedly achieved in office, because not even his supporters care about trade policy or tariffs. They want an enemy, and they want to be told they and Trump will destroy that enemy together because they are the real Americans. So that's what Trump gave them, again and again, a feast of fear and resentment designed to get them to the polls. It was enough in 2016, and Trump thinks it'll do the job in 2020.

If there was anything new in the speech -- which was mostly Trump reading from a teleprompter, plus the expected weirdass asides -- nobody has identified it. He complained about the press and the crowd chanted "CNN sucks," and he explained what a threat to the nation Hillary Clinton is -- in fact, he mentioned her eight times during the 80-minute rant.

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