Mitt Romney Still Griping About Candy Crowley's Debate Moderation Because Jesus Please Shut Up


Oh Mittens. Why couldn’t you just get fat and sassy and grow a beard like other presidential losers, huh? Oh that’s right – because staying out of the public eye and not griping about being a sore loserman takes class, and perhaps that program hasn’t been uploaded yet. Instead, you are still rehashing things that happened like a million years ago, because we guess you still like seeing your name in print, and not for your funny dancing.

Willard is all wah-wah-wah over that time Candy Crowley called him a lying liar during the presidential debate when he lied about BENGHAZI. You remember that, right? Well, Mitt certainly still remembers it, because he was yammering on and on about it on the Hugh Hewitt radio show the other day, per Mediaite:

I thought her jumping into the interaction I was having with the president was also a mistake on her part and one I would have preferred to carry out between the two of us, because I was prepared to go after him for misrepresenting to the American people that the nature of the attack.

Mitt, we get it. You are a losing loser and want to blame everyone in America for picking the Kenyan Muslim Socialist over the Romneybot 2000. But try to keep at least a shred of the DIGNITY 2.0 program intact, k? 

If you don’t remember the debate, here’s what happened. The issue of BENGHAZI came up, and Mitt was all, “the President took 14 days to call it an act of terror.” When in reality, Bamz called it an 'act of terror' THE DAY AFTER IT HAPPENED.

In the Rose Garden.

On national teevee.

When Candy Crowly corrected Mittens, Prezzy Obama sat there like a fuckin champ, just drinking in the sweet sweet nector of Mitt’s humiliation. Seriously, check it out, because it still makes you feel tingly in your special place the 80th time around:

Well, Romney is still peeved about it, because that's what happens when you are petulant whiny arrogant loserbot:

“And I must admit that, at that stage, I was getting a little upset at Candy, because in a prior setting where I was to have had the last word, she decided that Barack Obama was to get the last word despite the rules that we had,” he continued. “So she obviously thought it was her job to play a more active role in the debate than was agreed upon by the two candidates."

A hint to old Mittster: that is President Obama, just FYI, and here is another hint, that is a thing that you will not be in 2016. Also, it’s good to know that almost 18 months after the debate, the thing Mitt is upset about is not that he was a lying liar who tried to lie his way into the White House, but that he got caught and called out on it. That’s the lesson here, kids – as a politician, you should be able lie all you want and the media is never supposed to correct you, because freedom or the Monroe Doctrine or something.

When we are all sitting in the dayroom of our nursing homes, there will be Mitt Romney, still yammering on about the time Candy Crowley did not let him get the last word when he was supposed to have the last word, until he talks us to death like Billy did to Brenda in the finale of Six Feet Under. Or like this, we can't decide.



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